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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Baby starting to dislike cot - how can I help?

11 replies

CantWaitForTheSnow · 28/11/2006 12:42

I'm sure this must have an obvious solution, but I don't know what to do about it.

Dd is starting to cotton on to the slow walk towards the cot, the putting down gently, and her going to sleep.
Trouble is, where as before I could put her down semi awake and she would doze off, now as I approach the cot she starts tensing up, realising whats about to happen, and so starts crying before her hed has even hit the pillow if you see what I mean.

I can't feed her to sleep in her cot because she's b/f. I can't feed her then walk around for a bit to try and con her as that wakes her up more.

I try and keep cot time for sleeping only, not playing. Wondered if 'being' in the cot was a problem, but she seems happy enough to sit in there whilst I put clothes away and so on in the same room.

How has anyone else got through this?

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theinvisiblegirl · 28/11/2006 13:02

How old is she? If she's over 10mths I'd be tempted to try controlled crying...I know not every one agrees with it but, although it is hard, it's worked with all 3 of mine.

All of mine went through the stage of realising it was bedtime and NOT wanting to go, and then the screaming because they don't want to be there. If she's still young, try putting her down but staying with her, sing to her, stroke her hair or something until she calms. Or try playing some quite music, something that might distract her.

HTH.

Original poster

CantWaitForTheSnow · 28/11/2006 13:08

She is 7 months. Her bedtime routine was going really well, she would make a few whimpering / grunting noises for a minute or two then fall asleep. We use classic fm at bedtime. Staying with her hasn't calmed her down before, but haven't tried it for a long time so will try it again.

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cruisemum1 · 28/11/2006 13:16

hmm. I have a similar prob with ds 11 weeks old(how old is your dd?). He doesn't seem to like to go in his cot awake and every night I have to go to him, get him back to sleep and then put him in his cot where (this is the confusing part) he will sleep for up to 9 hours! He even wakes early hours but will happily coo and gurgle before settling himself back to sleep until around 6 - 7am! Sorry I am not offerig any solutions but at least you know you are not alone

mumj06 · 28/11/2006 14:19

You could try a night light, or one of those toys with lights and nature sounds: I received one as a gift and it worked! Also, do you use a sleeping bag? My dd hated one of those, so we used a bigger one and she could again sleep...like a baby .

chocolateshoes · 28/11/2006 14:34

Does she have a toy that she always takes to bed with her? If not it might be worth starting that. DS has a toy rabbit comforter (bought from JoJoMamanBebe) that 'lives' in his cot so he only has her for sleep.

PinkKangaroo · 28/11/2006 14:35

My dd (9months) went through a similar phase about 2 weeks ago.
When she started crying we would wait for a bit, then lift her, check nappy small bf then back to bed.
When we knew it wasn't nappy/hunger we would leave her to cry for a while to see if she would settle again.
She has some 'quiet' toys/teethers in her cot that are there all the time.
We also use this CD on a loop in her room all night

Original poster

CantWaitForTheSnow · 28/11/2006 14:42

Like Cruisemum's ds she is happy to play in her cot in the morning, and plays happily sitting up in there. As soon as I lie her down she doesn't like it.

Using a sleeping bag helped her to sleep through the night I think

She has 'cot toys' and 'daytime toys' to try and distinguish between night and day.

I think its an association between cot, lying down and crying that I need to try and break. What would happen if I encouraged her to play lying down in her cot for 5 mins each day. Would that cause a problem - would she learn to associate cot and playing?

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Original poster

CantWaitForTheSnow · 28/11/2006 14:48

OK, think now I've rambled so much its now clearer in my mind. So she's obviously worked out that going in her cot means going to sleep. She would prefer to be up and about, even when she's obviously tired, so cries to complain about it.

Should I try cc until (sorry if this sounds harsh ) dd learns that bedtime is bedtime and is non negotiable.

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PinkKangaroo · 28/11/2006 14:53

Usually I put dd in her cot after lunch.
She potters about with her toys for a while, has a bit of a shout and then (touch wood) goes for a nap.
As long as she's having 'quiet time' I don't mind if she sleeps or not.
Gives me time to do dishes etc.
Tried to differ between 'playtime' in livingroom/playpen and 'quiet time' in dim nursery/cot
Hope that helps you a bit, although I don't think I'm explaining it very well

Original poster

CantWaitForTheSnow · 28/11/2006 15:03

PinkKangaroo I think that sounds great. 'Quiet time' sounds good. If she sleeps then that's a bonus. Think I need a good distraction so she doesn't cry the moment she reaches her cot. Perhaps a change of mobile or toys.

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PinkKangaroo · 28/11/2006 15:13

dd has an ELC Button Horse, several teethers and an IKEA rattle that are 'cot only' toys.
We also got brightly patterned giftwrap and put in big cheap frames on the wall above her cot which she enjoys looking at(easy and cheap to change)
Soft books are also a favourite.
'noisy' toys stay in playpen/living room

I think lo's go through a 'clingy' phase as well which she may well be going through

Good Luck!!

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