Whenever i shout at my dd for being naughty....she bites her fingers very hard :-(

[biglips]

Do i ignore it or wha?

she will be 26m on 1st dec

I'd ignore it and see if she stops it in next couple of weeks. If no difference then try something else.

Hopefully it is just to get attention.

NOt nice for you though is it?

She's still very young - is she biting her fingers because she is frightened while you are shouting at her? Does she cry, or what?

I think I would try and use different tecniques - try not to shout (oooh, if I could reach back and take back the times I yelled 'don't whinge' at DS), get down to her level and talk to her firmly but calmly.

It sounds as if she might be feeling a bit overwhelmed? She can't be concentrating or taking in what you are saying if she is biting her fingers so hard.

Yes she does it when she is a bit overwhelmed...as im trying to learn not to shout at her and she sometimes shouts at me too... its so hard to do it in a calm voice...how do u do it???

biglips I think it is about BEING calm yourself, or as calm as you can be in the situation...cliched things like counting to ten can really work for some people; or find some other way that you can give yourself a delay before answering or dealing with dd. And just try to remember that you actually have more effect on children if you get down to their level, really look them in the eye, and tell them clearly rather than shouting.....many many kids just learn to switch off totally from shouting anyway so it's just a waste of breath.

Also, at her age use distraction like it's going out of fashion, and just expect to play with her loads to keep her out of trouble, and give as much attention as you possibly can....and make sure you are not fighting all the battles; only the absolutely vital for safety ones really at this age I think! work on ignoring lots and not pressuring yourself to deal with everything...my ante-natal teacher, mum of 3, calls it 'putting the telescope up to the blind eye'.

my dd used to say she heard voices talking really fast when I got angry

thought I was creating a schizophrenic,thankfully she's ok