very angry toddler- asd or just behaviour?!!

[NessaWH123]

Hi I have a 28 month old son who has been hard work from birth. Never settled, often cried and now at 28 months his behaviour is very embarrassing. He is very 'strong willed' all the time (which I know is many toddlers) but constantly shouts and screams at us. He has been to speech and language as he has had glue ear but their main concern was his very poor concentration. He points his finger and shouts no at people all the time, constantly pushes and hits and if random strangers or people he knows enters the room he usually shouts at them ..is this normal please? We tell him not to shout at people in a low stern voice, he sits on the time out chair/step for hitting and pushing..we are consistent and praise a lot when he does respond well but I am worried about his behaviour and lack of concentration. I feel silly asking but I worry about things like ASD and if so how to manage it. I know he is young and this is probably to early to tell but when he goes to the child-minder I look at the other children and they don't constantly look for a fight! Any advise please..i feel so embarrassed when out and about or visiting people as he will happily start at my grandparents house etc...

Thanks for that ilk look into it. A couple of close family have wondered about autism but if doesn't seen t fit alit of the criteria as far as I can see ..but I do wonder. Im hoping his is just an angry toddler and will grow out of it as its grinding me down:(

No, Nessa, this behaviour is not normal and I don't think its very helpful other posters telling you that it is. There is certainly a range of behaviour for toddlers and some will be perfectly well behaved while others are hard work, but your DS sounds quite extreme and you are clearly very worried about him. It could be because he's simply not hearing and getting frustrated, but I would want a referral to a paediatrician for a full developmental assessment, if it was me. If there is something going on (ASD, ADHD, or whatever), then early diagnosis and intervention can be very helpful, both for the DC and their parents/caregivers. Don't dismiss your worries. If there is a nagging little voice in your head telling you something is wrong, listen to it and don't be brushed off by your GP. If s/he is not listening to you ask to see another GP in the practice and tell them your concerns. Give specific examples of his behaviour and be explicit about how hard both you and his CM are finding him to deal with.

Thanks Juneau for your comments. Which behaviours do u feel aren't normal ? Really hoped it was normal feel sick in my stomach now as t what else it might be:(

Well being strong willed is normal - many toddlers could be described this way.
Ditto the lack of concentration.
But the anger? Not normal in my experience, although if his hearing is very poor this could be a sign of his frustration.
The screaming and pointing? Once in a while, yes. All the time? I don't think so.
Regularly shouting at random strangers? Again, not something I've ever seen.
Pulling down a whole shelf of sweets in a shop? Difficult to say. Most toddlers have tantrums and they can sometimes lead to dreadful and embarrassing behaviour, but I've never experienced such destructive behaviour in my DC or others I know well (apart from in one DC who has since been diagnosed with ASD). I was really surprised when he was diagnosed though, because he doesn't do a lot of the things I thought were typcial ASD behaviours. He never lined up his toys, for instance, he is capable of empathy, he gives hugs and welcomes physical contact, etc.

Having said all that, no one on an internet forum can tell you whether there is anything specifically concerning about your DC. Only a doctor can do this, and actually to get a diagnosis of a specific SN would require several different specialists meeting and observing your DC and coming to a joint conclusion. Which is why several of us have urged you to seek advice and help from your GP (as they must refer for all specialist appointments). Your local children's centre might also be able to help with strategies for helping with his behaviour if its decided that it within the normal range or due to his lack of hearing. It might be worth contacting your HV about that.

OK thanks I speak t my go :(

Gp

Nessa fwiw it doesn't seem like asd, he's totally there with you, he's pointing etc he's just very angry
He might have an imbalance that gets him to freak out
Do u give probiotics? Vitamins? Omega 3
Definitely go to GP it's always good to check! But also google gluten/casein and behaviour as I mentioned earlier and start by giving strong probiotic and omega 3

Good luck!

I'll look into that as well babymum1 he just takes s multivitamin. Did read what you mentioned earlier it had some relations to my little ones behaviour. I just want him happy so ill take all advise on board and investigate thanks