DD is 2 months - will stare intently at something then cry - anyone have insight?????

[Jam77]

Hi fellow netters! Just a quickie question that I'm hoping someone may be able to answer...my DD is 2 months old and loves sitting in her bouncy chair looking around her. Sometimes her eyes will settle intently on something (9 times out of 10 a light, mainly one of my spot lights) stare at it for a few minutes then start to cry. She did this with a mobile for her cot too (which I removed as she is either a) not ready or b) not a baby that likes mobiles. I kinda get the mobile thing - too much, too in her face, but I don't get the objects around the room thing.....anyone have any ideas?

Lights too bright ?

It's probably just random baby crying IYSWIM.... they stare, they cry, they sh1t, they sleep, they feed and then they go back to the beginning...

I agree - probably spotlight too bright and hurting eyes.

i got my 2 mth old a mobile too, with music - sometimes he loves it, altho max about 10 mins. then he gets pissed off, so i take off the music bit and bury it under the duvet so he can;t hear it! but today he was transfixed, watching the animals circling above his head. try it again, as i reckon they change so fast she might like it soon!

Smetimes it can be the too much too soon, can you go with mobile or music? or us there no choice?

I found it best to go through with mine whilst looking. So looking at animals or music at such a young stage it tens from my experience to be musical or animals and from their learning curve you can establish future developmentative processesses

don;t understand pink1, go through what? how can you assess their developmental progress?

Hi All - Thanks for the messages, always have spotlights on low and never right above DD - It's just so strange - DD started staring at my fireplace this morning (she loves to stare at it for some weird reason?!?) and then started to cry... I find it hard to know what DD should be doing all day, I feel so bad about her just sitting in her chair but don't ant to overstimulate her either....This motherhood lark is harder than people let on lol!!!!!!

It's a VERY hard time Jam. You are knackered (probably) and tbh, babies don't really do an awful lot of exciting stuff at this age. It is very easy to run out of things to do IYSWIM. We put dd on her playmat, waiting for excited kicking of objects, we put her in her pushchair and went for walks, we went for drives to famous gardens / houses, went to the shops etc.... It's also hard to get together with a friend because you can bet as soon as one baby is reasonably calm or feeding or sleeping or looking contented, the other one will get antsy. However, it's a good time to meet people and chat about your bundle of fun, so I would try and find some mum and baby things to try. I think you've actually just got to muddle through. We found doing what we wanted to do, and just accomodating the baby was generally the best plan as we stayed happy that way. dd seemed to be perfectly happy sleeping / napping wherever, but that's not always the case.

IIRC 12 - 16 weeks was the period when things started easing up a bit, both wrt sleep as well as dd seeming a little clamer and more predictable IYSIWM as well as being more interested in her environment.

Do you have a CD of nursery rhymes / lullabys ? They can be fun for cuddling, as are those high-contrast soft baby books. We used to routinely make bath time an activity too, one of us would get in, cuddle dd, the other pour lovely warm water on her etc. could draw out the evening 'wind down' quite a while.

hth a bit.

btw, don't feel bad about leaving baby in her recliner / day bed / or just reading a magazine with her having a cuddle and doing no 'stimulating' things. She'll have fun looking at you, what you're up to, listening to everything around her etc.

babies are random at this age - she has no understanding of what she is looking at, except for a basic understanding of faces.

Be careful with the spotlights though if she DOES have a habit of staring at them - make sure she can't actually stare at the bulbs (I swivelled all my halogen spotlights to the ceiling at this age).

Thanks guys - some good ideas hub2dee - thanks, I am getting out and about more now - and DD is usually ok, sad thing is DD has now got quite colicy (just got back from Doctors re her belly problems) so sometimes I take her to friends and have to leave as she is crying so much am hoping this is just a phase as It breaks my heart to think she's feeling sad/in pain and I can't help it's good to come on here and get support and advise

If she's super extra collicy then you're really having a hard time LOL. I mean many at this age are 'fractious', but if her tummy / feeding is also giving her some aggro, she'll be spontaneously crying for no reason, as you're observing. If you're bottle feeding have you bothered with trying changes to the teat / bottle ? We had good results from Dr. Browns, but this might not be relevant to you.

Re: leaving / crying... it's up to you how you handle it and I appreciate it's awkward, but honestly, babies do it at this age. Not all, granted, but it's not uncommon IYSWIM. Would she maybe respons to a quick spin in the pushchair or a quick stroll stuffed into some kind of baby sling ? Then youcan pop back to your friends after a couple of minutes alone. No point missing out on a nice muffin.

Are you on the antenatal thread for August / September ? You'll find a nice crowd of people in similarish situations / stages ?

If you find the crying becomes really problematic for you, there's an organisations called Cry sis which might be useful.

Thanks hub...wasn't very collicy until 2 weeks ago but has had belly problems from the start (very bad wind etc) have just changed milk after asking HV for weeks if I could (gone onto cow and gate comfort) and the change in feeding time is amazing, is now taking full feeds again without crying, but is still getting colic most evenings Feel bad as if I had carried on breastfeeding (had to stop due to blistered and bleeding) I may not have these problems....blimey never experienced guilt like it till DD came along!! lol

Also did join the september thread but never got answers to anything I posted

Glad the new milk seems better.

The threads sometimes are full of people who've been posting since ttc, or for maybe 8 months before the birth IYSWIM, so it's not always easy to 'break in' IYSWIM, also many people are first time mums, so it can be hard to get hold of advice from more experienced parents - often non one's got an answer too because babies being 'dfficult' is essentially quite normal ! Maybe your HV / baby clinic could be approached or the local baby groups as I mentioned ?

Good luck with everything !

Thanks Hub....

Very small babies get tired very quickly, with mine, at that age I would put him in his moses basket in the dark to relax and he quickly learnt to fall asleep. Good luck.

Thanks eastendgirl

Is your daughter not simply tired? I found it really hard to tell with both my dc, but can promise that things will improve at about 14 weeks. Both my kids were colicky in the evenings until this point, when I miraculously managed to spot when they were tired & put them down for naps and evenings sorted themselves out. Guide in the early days was babies could rarely stay awake more than 1.5 hours each time & trick to put into bed just before baby got overtired.

Hang in there - it only gets easier.

Thanks Tired, DD was napping really well in day and is now a bit hit and miss good to hear that it should improve in next few weeks - part of me knows that must be true as people say it but at the same time I worry it won't? silly huh?