My 2 and a half year old won't sleep past half 4!! Please help!

[shanicepee]

I've tried everything and when I say everything I mean everything! He will be three in September and he understands things, he just refuses to listen when it comes to going back to sleep. His room is dark, he had glow in the dark stars, he sleeps with cars, I've tried a sleep trainer clock, I've left him to cry it out, I've been in and out putting him down on many occasions and then eventually I've given up and brought him back to my bed. The list is endless of the things I've tried, later bed times, leaving him juice, leaving toys so he can play etc. it's stressing me out, I'm always tired and weak, I'm taking it out on my partner who isn't even my sons dad. I've spoken to doctors and health visitors and even his Nursary and as always everyone says the same thing, BE PERSISTENT! I'm so tired of hearing that because I have been. I've even tried 'this works baby sleep spray' and nothing works. My son doesn't want to sleep past half 4 with out me and I can't bare it anymore. I would appreciate some advice please.
Thank you.

Oh poor you, sleep deprivation is horrific, especially at an age when everyone else's children seem to have grown out of the sleepless nights

How long has it been going on like this for?

Is 4.30 the only time he wakes at night or does he go back to sleep without you at other times?

I was going to say GroClock as that's been fab for making my toddler stay in bed (not sleep necessarily, just stay physically in the bed, but I see you've already tried that anyway). That said, mine still goes through periods of separation anxiety when waking in the night, and the only thing that's worked has been to give whatever he needs in terms of cuddles/singing/comfort until the phase comes to an end in it's own time.

You sound at the end of your tether (understandably) and a little bit as if you're bouncing between ideas that might help in a stressed out way... I've been there myself and it did seem that the baby/toddler picks up on it and feels LESS able to relax into a good sleep routine.

Has anything happened that might be disturbing his sleep/making his wake up feeling anxious? New sibling, new nursery, new partners etc can all take a while to settle into. Not that makes it any easier for you!

Sorry, this is mostly a list of questions! I'm sure there will be lots of people with some actual helpful advice here soon

You say you have tried everything but you haven't said how long you have tried each method. You need to keep at one strategy for a good few weeks. No deviation, no variation. The same language used and the same response. I know that sounds like "be persistent" but constantly switching or abandoning strategies means that he learns that all he needs to do is wait it out and you will cave. I hope that doesn't sound too harsh!