Nasty 2.5 year old

[Dominee1986]

Hi
Has anyone had the same situation , my son is 2.5 and he's very shy sensative abs gentle and loving but I'm finding when his dad is around he's a different child, he starts to be nasty to be and I can't do anything for him Daddy got to do it all. I feel really useless as he's my world and I want to do everything for him but I can't even change his bum, make him dinner or drinks he cries and says daddy do it.
I work so not sure weather this has something to do with it

does he not see his dad very often? maybe he's attention seeking because he doesn't see him enough or have enough emotional contact with him, so is trying hard to get his dad's attention?

also sounds like you might be a bit overbearing and suffocating DS if you want to do everything for him all the time. If this is the case, can you back off a bit and let his dad do it without trying to interfere? Your DS will have more respect for you if you're not constantly following him and trying to do stuff for him, particularly when his dad is about. At 2.5 he's gaining independence rapidly. Play it a bit cooler and he might come around and actively seek your attention when he realises it's not on tap all the time.

By nasty do you mean he's rejecting you? If so then it isn't nastiness, it's discovering his ability to decide stuff and general fickleness. If you just shrug and ride it out it will swing round to you at some point.

Yes the use of the word nasty isn't appropriate when describing your 2 year old.

You shouldn't take his actions so personally. He is just a baby still really.

It is all just phases that you need to take with a pinch of salt while modelling nice behaviours yourself.

I don't get how he is being nasty?

He isn't nasty - he's 2! He's just learning his way in the world- my DD is the same age and obsessed with her daddy- 'no no mummy, I want daddy' is her key phrase! It's just a control thing, sometimes we let her choose who does what if it's nothing of consequence, sometimes we will say 'no dd daddy is busy cooking/resting/whatever mummy is doing your bath. You can walk upstairs or mummy will carry you' she might whine a bit but then gets over it . It's normal behaviour

It sounds like he needs more time with his father.

Calling a child nasty is not a good thing to do.

It's not nasty. It's normal behaviour. I assume you are the primary care giver. So when his dad his home he wants him to look after him. It's perfectly normal. Why would you want to everything if his dad is there?

David sometimes wants one of us to do something, he is 4. We work from home so sometimes it's not possible for me to do and Dhaka has to or vice versa. Since he is 4 and able to understand he just accepts it now. But at 2.5 I wouldn't have minded. It's about him getting to make some decisions in his own life and wanting his daddy.

Sorry just seen you work? So is dh the sahp?

I still doubt it has anything to do with it. Just a phase. I think you feel rejected, but it's not about how he feels about you.

Please don't use words like nasty to describe a toddler.

How much interaction does his Dad have with him? My ds3 is nearly 3 and similar; he's very clingy when DH is around and is only interested in daddy. I use these moments as a break for myself to get things done alone really; ds3 is quite independent but needs a lot of supervision.

What does his dad think about him behaving differently when he's aroynd? Is he understanding and supportive of you?

He's not nasty at all! It's just a phase, don't take it personally and enjoy the peace before the tide changes and you have to do it all!