Violent temper tantrums

[Cheesewithbread]

Can anyone tell me if this is normal

30 month old dd always been a biter against twin sister. Her sister will snatch and push which usually results in a hit nowadays since the biting has stopped.

Problem is if she has a tantrum she now hits me. I've just had a half hr meltdown with her launching herself at me. She hits, pinches, scratches, goes to bite me, pulls my hair etc etc. I try cuddling her to calm her down, admittedly shouting, holding her wrists.

Is this normal? Every time I google around it mental health issues comes up. Her behaviour is pretty scary. This evenings episode was because she wasn't allowed another cupcake. These super tantrums happen maybe once a month not daily or anything. If she has a smaller tantrum she still hits me though and has to go straight to the naughty step without a warning. She's apologetic after and seems genuinely remorseful and like she can't help her temper.

She seems tired and possibily teething today. The cupcake was also not a usual thing we have in so I dont know if it's laced with a ton of additives which sent her mental. Help!!

Should add she has hit her dad once or twice but hasn't gone for anyone other than me and her sister. My mum is around a fair bit and she hasn't gone for anyone else.

She can't help her temper if she's only 30 months. Some kids do bite, and yes it's normal. Do you think the naughty step is working? It might be making her feel isolated, especially if no warning. I do sympathise - my son was am absolute terror between age 3 and 4. It is tough. I don't think hitting is at all unusual in children of that age. Things that helped us - the books Playful Parenting, How To Talk So Your Child Will Listen. The website ahaparenting

Thanks - I just need some reassuring. You read some things online and they indicate a severe problem!

It was just the way she repeatedly launched at me really trying to hurt me that I found worrying. I'm at home full time with them but think if she does that at preschool she'll just be expelled?!

Thank you so much - I'll look up those resources. We have used the step since they were 2 and it doesn't seem to work to be honest. For everything else they receive a warning but we take her straight to the step for hitting now and say "you hit, you sit" to try and emphaise the seriousness!

Yes, I understand the need to emphasize the seriousness, but from her point of view it's just lashing out because she is young and frustrated and unable to control herself. It's not as sinister as when an adult hits . You said yourself she doesn't go for anyone else - which just shows she feels secure enough with you to let her guard down. Don't worry about pre school! They will be experienced with this, it's not unusual, likely her behaviour will be very different at school anyway, and she will rapidly learn natural consequences from other children. It'll be ok :)

Thanks again, just hard to know what's normal - not the kind of thing parents like saying their kids do! Time for a glass of wine here I think!

Yes, have some wine and relax - will be good for all of you :)

I've got 32 month DT'S, tonight DS did exactly the same because he wanted sweets at bedtime, I had to hold him at arms length to stop him hitting me and trying to pull my hair. Its pretty upsetting when it happens. You are not alone - not very helpful though.

She did it again tonight! I look like a cats been at my arms! And a bite mark. I think something bigger is going on - maybe back molars. Sometimes just need to know it's not just me - thanks.