any tips for a sneaky son?

[Codswallop]

ds1 is a very open, optimistic and cheery chap but now he has hit the dizzy heights of 5.5 he is becoming rather deceitful and has been caught out lying (which he does as badly as his Dad) a lot this week.

Is this a stage? how do you draw the line between him owning up and being more lenient or reading the riot act all the time?

I've always told my kids that they will get into more trouble by lying than by doing something wrong. So far (I think) it's worked. I think all kids lie/make things up and I wouldn't worry about this but if for instance someone had spilled a drink over I would expect an honest answer from the person that did it.

his crimes consist of:

1. chucking packed lunch under the table at school so he can go outside
2. telling me dh left a sweet out for them when he didnt,
3. blaming ds2 for somthing so important I cant remember what it was.
4. telling me that dh and him had done his h/w reading when thay hadnt

really Petty things but I dont like it

at least you say he lies badly, coddy, so you know the truth. If my sons do this I tend to be very matter of fact, say 'oh yeah' and smile unbelievingly. I don't tend to read the riot act unless the lie is really malicious or gets someone else in trouble. It sounds like your son could have picked this up at school. There are some sneaky children in my oldest son's class. He says they grass up others and tell outright lies. He uses this to justify his actions when he gets sneaky. As he doesn't like the sneaky children, I ask if he wants to lose his own friends, because he will if he is sneaky with them. When my son is at the receiving end of a sneaky lie and suffers, I get very cross on his behalf about the mean person who did this to him and say how I hope he never does this to his friends etc etc.

and the other thing I do is tell my sons I know exactly how many biscuits are in the biscuit tin, so I will know if one is missing etc and that dh and their teachers will always tell me if somethng is amiss - I imply my eyes are everywhere and I have spies on every corner...

I think it's just at that stage they realise they can get their own way by pretending (lying) about the facts - so of course they do. Would have thought that when he's old enough to realised that lying has bad consequences he'd stop.

DS1 is doing this sort of thing Coddy! I think it is a stage because they are coming to realise that you don't actually know everything that they do. They've worked that bit out but don't yet realise that lying can be "naughty".

I agree with Tigermoth....it is only worth getting really cross if it is serious and just do a raised eyebrow when you know he is lying.

You could always play him at his own game and if he HAS done is hw reading....tell him you dont believe him cos he lied last time and make him do it again!! That will stop him lying about that!

I would be cross about the packed lunch though and would maybe stop a treat for that ie crisps or bisc that he usually enjoys!