Anyone get hung up on milestones with babies?

[Countryside14]

I do and I can't help it. My dd is 1 in 2 weeks and I'm constantly watching her and worrying about whether she should or shouldn't be doing certain things and if they something to be concerned about. I have nothing to compare her to although I know you shouldn't anyway.

Just looking for some reassuring words.

I think it's natural. I wouldn't say I was hung up as such but I do like to know what ds is expected to be able to do and so on. I'm a SAHM so ds doesn't go to nursery so there's only me looking out for stuff! I just like to know that he's there or therabouts with things. Ds is just about to turn 16 months and talking is my latest one. Hv says he's absolutely fine but it is sort of my job to know. I know you shouldn't compare too but i can't help it! All of the mums I know do it, it's not competitive, more "can your baby do x yet?" kind of thing.
Do you get the NHS emails? I think anything seriously needing attention would be on them.

I didn't with the dds

With dd1 I was just amazed by every single step of progress, and she was fairly by the book. (PFB!)

With dd2, it happened without me noticing and before I knew it I was holding conversations with a little person (only a year between her and dd1, so it was a bit of a whirl)

With ds, every painful gap in his development was glaring and a worry. When he was 7 months old we realised that he was not developing in the way the girls did, and even now at nearly 5, I am constantly aware of his developmental progress (and wish I wasn't)

That's like me. I like to know what thing she should and shouldn't be doing. She was a late babbler (10m) although always made noise before that it wasn't your bababa dadada type thing. Now she's always doing it. That was what first got me worried. Now I can't seem to shake it off. She waves, claps, enjoys peekaboo and being chased. Can crawl very fast since 8 months. Can stand alone and cruise and walk with her walker. She points at lots of thugs although I'm not always sure what it is she's pointing at. Maybe she just likes to do it. I think she's trying to say bye bye and dog but I've not heard it clearly yet.

Does that all sound ok? I'm a first time mum and suffer with anxiety as it is but it's worse than ever now.

Yes, that all sounds great. The pointing thing is positively showing off. Ds only started to point last week! Ds started to walk at 1 but he was quite early I think. He says a few words, dada, nana, quack quack (for all birds) but not as many as some of my friends babies. My friends little girl has cerebral palsy and she said that her developmental problems were very, very obvious and profound, not at all the kind of how-may-steps-can-he-take stuff. I'm sure you've nothing to worry about.

I don't know of she points because I've been pointing at things and it's just an action like weaving and clapping or if she really is pointing at something. I'm hoping as he gets older it'll become more clear.

For anyone else, who might stumble on this as we once did, it is very important to note that milestones are only guidelines. I mean, how different are you from your partner? Now imagine how different you were just after birth!

Everyone has different speeds, temperaments and learning styles. It is important not to get worried, but it is important to be aware of development achievements and monitor against a framework. so you have a rough idea of progression.

Here are some good sites with great advice - the third link simplifies it if you are in a rush.

www.motherandbaby.co.uk/baby-and-toddler/baby/baby-development-and-milestones
www.emedicinehealth.com/infant_milestones/article_em.htm#what_are_infant_milestones
www.clarestoys.com/baby-milestones/baby-development-milestones-0-12-months/

My DS did everything largely on time - some slightly late and some slightly early - but everything pretty much standard. At 5 he was diagnosed with autism. He's getting on very well now at age 8 and has a very happy life.

Hi! I go through phases of doing this too where I look up what my 9 month old should be doing and the only time I do this is when her little friends / nursery kids do something she can’t do yet and it worries me slightly, my only advice is that whilst she’s behind on some things she’s also ahead in others, you’ll probably find yours is too! Some of her peers crawled before she could but she could clap and wave before them! They’re all different! I try to take comfort in that if I ever worry about development