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Behaviour/development

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Boys behaviour

7 replies

nikk49 · 01/11/2006 20:34

My soon to be 3year old sons behaviour in general is good however I have trouble in a couple of areas and am at the end of my tether often reduced to tears. My main problem is that he runs off and wont walk with me he has no sense of danger and often ends up in the middle of the road. I am always seen chasing him down the street. He is reluctant to go in the pushchair and will not wear reins just hangs like a puppet.Any ideas to control my boy gratefully recieved.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
nikk49 · 01/11/2006 20:40

people say he's just a typical boy what do you think?????

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flack · 01/11/2006 20:42

Typical... little sods, aren't they? Mine used to reduce me to tears quite regularly.

CatsdontlikefireworksBert · 01/11/2006 20:42

Although I found it easier with my first, my second (DD) was a complete nightmare like this.

Of course they don't have a sense of danger.

Tips. Don't be constantly saying "stop, stop stop, careful don't run into the road" or they stop listening. Practise somewhere. Try letting him run off somewhere (safe) and then yell "STOP" at the top of your voice, and see if it works. Then you can use the STOOOOOOP moment when you really need it.

Be consistent. It's an old addage, but one which works. Took a LONG time, but did kick in with both DDs. Always take the buggy and you can use it as a threat. Ask him to hold the buggy as you are walking along the road, in a carpark etc. But go places where you can let him run a bit as well. When he does come back praise massively.

Frankly, if he is becoming dangerous, then strap him in the buggy, and tell him you are doing so because he wouldn't walk nicely. They pick up on this stuff quickly.

I will let my DD2 (2.5) walk along where it is safe, but I ALWAYS require her to hold my hand when walking through carparks etc. If she refuses, drops, hangs, tantrums... I just stand still and say "we are not going anywhere until you hold my hand, or I will (put you in buggy, pick you up etc). Again - if they are yearning for independence to walk - they will pick this up quickly enough.

It seems like the longest time, but you will get there in the end if you are consistent.

MerlinsBeard · 01/11/2006 20:43

you can get reins that go round their wrist and round yours. would that work?

sunnysideup · 01/11/2006 21:26

I totally agree with cats..I have really struggled with my DS on this, he just wants to be free and run, never mind whether it's the park or a busy road!!!

Cats is right, you basically can't give him the choice of whether he will go in the buggy or wear reins. He MUST do one or the other if he can't hold your hand. Kids are logical, he will see this IF you are consistent and keep on with the same approach. Give him the chance to walk with you and hold your hand, then if he runs give him a warning that if he can't stay with you then he will have to go in the buggy.

I'm pretty sure this will work, you just need to be consistent and your DS needs to sense a steely determination on your part

A friend did have a system where she 'trained' her DS to stop by making it a game - he would stand still when she shouted 'stop' and then she'd shout 'go!' etc etc....tried this with my ds but he was not reliable enough, sometimes just ignored me shouting stop and buggered off!!!!

good luck!

skallywag · 02/11/2006 12:14

With mine, similar age, I let him walk by me. If we're right by a road he either has to hold my hand, or help push the pushchair. If he won't or runs off, he's in the pushchair, don't care how much he protests. No discussion or 2nd chances, as - he has to learn, - I've got other dcs I have to think of, - I can't take all boody day to get from a to b.

nikk49 · 17/11/2006 13:16

thanks guys all good advice. You know what the school playground is like though. everyone looking towards the screaming child!! Of course their children never create a fuss!!!!

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