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Constant battle of wills - help!

4 replies

Happydaze247 · 06/04/2015 20:36

Please can someone help me? My dd is 2.5 yrs old and, for the last few months has become more and more difficult at bedtime and all the rest of the day really She stalls for time so much that bedtime has become such a long drawn out, stressful affair. We are in a vicious cycle of more drink, more breastfeeds, more cuddles, more nappy changes and so on. If we refuse her anything she goes into meltdown. When we eventually put her down in her cot she still screams and screams.

She is clearly overtired as she refuses to nap in the day, yet she only sleeps for ten broken hours at night. When she wakes at night she is inconsolable and takes at least an hour to settle. She will not be cuddled or soothed.

She has had paractemol, Ibiuprofen and homeopathic teething powder. I am at the end of my tether. I recent suffered a miscarriage @ 6 weeks and I feel that this situation may have been one of the factors that caused it. I am so tired from 6 days of heavy blood loss but I cannot get the rest that I need.

Dh works shifts and so cannot always help with bedtime. We have always been against leaving her to cry but I have got to the point that I am so angry with her that I have had to walk away.

Has anyone else experience anything similar, at this age? TIA.

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 06/04/2015 21:28

So sorry about your MC, your situation sounds like me at that stage and I found it truly crippling, so you have my sympathy Smile

She's very young not to be having a nap in the day and I agree that she does sound overtired. Are you with her in the day? Could you take her into your bed after lunch, bf her and see if you can both get an hour or would taking her for a drive or walk help her to get off?

Have you tried the No Cry Sleep Solution for babies and toddlers? I found it to be very good Smile

If she's asking for drinks, could you leave a sippy cup of water in her bed? For the last bf, I'd feed her as much as she wants for the first feed then put her down. If you can get a few nights when your dh is home, do this then go out. she can't have more bus if your not actually there.

Are you looking after yourself too? Sounds like you need some good nutrition, sun and gentle cerise and a bit of tlc too Thanks

Happydaze247 · 06/04/2015 21:42

Thank you for replying. I agree she is very young to not still be napping but we have given up trying tbh. She fought it for months and was not settling until after 2pm, or often not at all. If she did nap she slept well but then didn't settle to sleep at bedtime until around 9pm and then woke for the day at 5:30am.

She will not fall asleep in the car unless we have driven for 2 hours (I kid you not) and has refused to go in her buggy at all for many months now. Even when she did go into her buggy, she hadn't slept in it since she was 5 months old.

I really do think she needs the nap as her night waking is a classic sign that she is overtired. I only work part time so I am with her 4 days out of 7. I have tried lying with her but, unless she is poorly or very, very tired this does not work.

I am feeling so run down right now. Without a nap in the day or decent/ unbroken night's sleep I am starting to suffer. Sad

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 06/04/2015 21:47

Ok, that is tough then. Would she tolerate an hours quiet time? Things like books, reading to her, duplo or play doh?

Happydaze247 · 06/04/2015 21:55

Yes, we're working on the 'quiet time'. She loves her books. We managed 20 mins of Frozen this afternoon!

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