Very stubborn 3.5yo

[HangingInAGruffaloStance]

My DD is very single minded aka stubborn.

I'm aware this isn't always a bad thing. However she had huge tantrums over basic things, like (this morning with her Dad) getting dressed or (tonight with me) sitting at the table to eat rather than eating from a bowl in an armchair. I wasn't forcing her to sit, just saying she couldn't eat in an armchair. Result an hour of intermittent crying/screaming/throwing self at door/floor.

I try to remain calm and firm, and not give in to tantrumming. Anything we can do to make things go more smoothly? The getting dressed/undressed thing happens a lot and is particularly challenging. It would obv be much better to find a way to get her happier about getting dressed/changed.

Would a race help? Or being silly eg right, here's your pants put them on your nose...

Or just leave her to it (given its the holidays) and make it clear that nothing happens (no breakfast, no fun playing with you, no help getting toys out etc) until she's got dressed.

On food, I would just say that if she was hungry she could eat at the table and if she wasn't then that's fine, but no food elsewhere. Ride out subsequent tantrum (possibly in a different room).

But have you tried all that sort of thing?

Make things fun! Not races, more just plain stupidity. Pretending she's a show dog or a dinosaur fairy or a whale stuck on a rock

My dd is a few months younger so might not apply but I have found recently that she is much more amenable if she is given warning about what is going to happen. Ie "after this we will get dressed" rather than "it's time to get dressed now".

Make it fun and into a game at this age they get very grumpy following rules all the time so give her two choices (that you'd be happy with) and it will feel to her like she has more control.

Thanks all. Yes the message re food is eat at the table, I don't force her to diet there, just font let her trail food all over the house.

Unfortunately she sees through the race to get dressed, games etc. I had some success today with letting her pick her outfit, but we just had a min meltdown over taking it off for bed!

I'm also trying giving ,ore attention and praise when she is "good". Think this is helping.