Comments from pre-school worrying

[Namechanged101]

My dd is 2 years 2 months she started settling in sessions at preschool and had had 3 session less than am hour so far.
The key worker has commented on pushing for the Hv 2 year check up a few times.
I tried to get to the bottom of these comments to and basically she implied I should be concerned about my dd development as dd not particularly interested in surroundings just focusing on playing with a certain thing then moving in to next thing, being quiet.
I explained that dd can be shy and is is just exploring all the you options there. Explained I was happy with her development as she can say lots of words eg our names, food names, animals, colours (and knows the colour), numbers, shapes (and recognises some) she can say some sentences that she copies or puts together from words she knows.
Preschool said as they hadn't seen evidence if this they could only take my word for it.
There wasn't really an upshot of this conversation that was that but I came home in tears have spoken. To Hv they will call me back properly Tomo- should I be worried I've always thought she was doing ok?

If they've Only seen her for three hours I'd take their opinion with a pinch of salt. She's probably just settling in. But you may as well have the HV check, can't do any harm and will put everyone's mind at rest.

She's only just started i think they are expecting too much of her. Some children take longer to settle and come out of their shell.
How does she play with other children outside of preschool?

I have a few friends who have nursery nurses like this. One puts it like this 'my nursery nurse thinks she's a social worker' sums it up pretty well. 3 sessions isn't long enough to
Assess anything. Even if your dc has a delay speech and language won't assess until the child has been in nursery for a term or so if I recall correctly.
The 2 year check asks for 50 words - unless your dd has significantly least man that I wouldn't worry.

Just re read op - less than an hour???? They are being ridiculous.

They don't know her and I think its too early for them to raise concerns. Maybe in 4 or 6 months when she's more settled?

Thanks all-
Yes half hour sessions and then an hour today.
She's never been to nursery before but goes to toddler groups and plays with her baby friends. I would say that she doesn't want to play with other children directly she's interested in what they are doing but doesn't engage with them one on one just wants their toys! When its a toddler group and its time to sit down and sing and song it do a craft thing dd is alawats the one running off which hadn't bothers me before but maybe she should be able to concentrate more?

That was 'sing a song' and 'do a craft' above

Ignore them. They shouldn't make such judgements based on such little evidence, and frankly I'd be questioning the choice of nursery if they think that's appropriate - have they even read the framework??? They are supposed to build up a picture of the child through careful, frequent observations and BUILDING A RELATIONSHIP with the child.

Ugh. Sorry.

Anyway. Don't do a thing, ignore nursery and carry on as usual and wait for your lovely, intelligent DD to amaze and astound them with her true personality. And enjoy the smug satisfaction as it happens

Have a look at the Early Years Outcomes

www.lancsngfl.ac.uk/curriculum/early_years/download/file/Early_Years_Outcomes[1].pdf

and make some notes about your DC against the age bracket they are in. Provide this to nursery and ask them to add their own comments to take to the two year check.

The short settling in sessions seem to be far too little to make an assessment against so far and your input should be invaluable to them helping your DC settle in.

I think they're all far too quick to judge and this just confirms it to me even more. My hv once tried to tell me my 2yo needed to be seen by SALT, I completely disagreed until my lo was seen and even after they'd confirmed my daughters speech was spot on for her age, she still had the cheek to question it! She decided all of this after meeting her for the first time, in a mind boggling 30 mins, because my lo didn't speak. Lol.
There's no way anyone can make a judgement like that even after days, so I wouldn't worry at all op x

They don't know her at all and cannot possibly advise you on the time they have spent with her. Please don't worry. My ds was hardly talking at all at 2 years. At his 2 year check which was at about 2.4 years due to moving area he still was quite limited with his vocabulary as he had an older sister who tended to speak for him! He is now 3.4 years and I cannot shut him up. I would be having words with the manager if the nursery nurse continues with her 'helpful advise'

Op your child sounds quite typical for 2.2 the not conforming in groups sounds very normal too for a child who hasn't yet been in a nursery setting. She will learn that by example. I wouldn't expect massive social interaction either - what you describe about playing alongside as opposed to with other children - again normal for her age - socialising will come don't worry.