Bad tempered 3yo

[caitlinohara]

I know, I know, aren't they all? Trouble is, ds3 is just out and out rude. He shouts at anyone who tries to talk to him other than immediate family (and we get it in the neck sometimes as well!) and is just so rude and unpleasant. Example: yesterday another mum on school run says hello. Ds3: "NO. I am NOT talking to you. You are NOT my mummy". Another child tries to talk to him. Ds3 "NO. I am NOT your friend". Lady in shop asks if comic I am buying is for him. Ds3 "I don't CARE!" Child at school coming towards him down narrow corridor - ds3 is enraged by anyone entering personal space and shoulder barges child out of the way, shouting something unintelligible. I could go on - these are just from the past few days.

I am really at a loss as to how to deal with this. My others were shy at times and I don't expect a 3yo to have great social skills with strangers, but I can't just let this go can I? I try to model good manners and living in a small town I do know lots of people so he does see me speaking to people all the time.

He gets put on naughty step or sent to room for misbehaving at home, but obv this all happens when we are out and about.

Any advice? He goes to nursery two mornings a week and I don't think he does it as much there but when he does I think they just ignore it, and I don't feel that I can.

Maybe you need to try and think about WHY he might be showing these responses; has he had a bad or, to him, frightening experience? Has anything changed in his life that has unsettled him? For how long has he been displaying these symptoms?

Personally, I don't like 'naughty step' or being sent to his bedroom. A child's bedroom should be a safe sanctuary for them, not a punishment.

At three it is probably expecting a lot for him to be able to EXPLAIN why he behaves like this, but in a quiet moment you could try asking. If he has a 'key worker' at nursery, ask if she can monitor and report any incidents like this.

Thanks for your reply. The reason I use naughty step etc is that I feel that it sends a message that anti social behaviour leaves you isolated, therefore a natural consequence. I know others may disagree.

I have asked him btw but he says he doesn't know. I can't think of anything that has triggered it but I do need to speak to nursery yes. He has always been like this to some degree though, except it used to be that he would throw things and now that has evolved into shouting

My LO has just turned 3 and can be like that, just plain rude in the way he responds sometimes. I do feel sometimes he doesn't realise what his tone of voice is like, but i do need to remind him to ask for things nicely/using his nice voice and remind him that it isn't nice to shout.

My LO is at nursery 3 days a week and has been told off a few times for being rough with the other children which we are working on but again i'm unsure if its him just being boisterous and getting too excited.

It is hard work!