Night-training wrecking 3 year old's sleep

[SolasEile]

My 3.4 year old has been starting to wake up dry some mornings for the past month or so but still wears a night time pull up as it's not consistently every morning yet. Unfortunately he seems stuck in a transition phase where he wakes up at 3 or 4 am needing the potty or saying his pull up is wet and he then struggles to get back to sleep afterwards. As a result he is tired at preschool and grumpy by 2pm.

He usually refuses to nap so we have to battle through until bedtime. On the rare days that he does nap, he's awake until 9 or even 10pm at night!

Anyone got any advice on how to manage this transition period? We have a 4 month old EBF baby who still feeds every 2-3 hours at night so I'm bloody exhausted... if I can get one of the two DC sleeping through the night I'll be happy...

He seems almost ready to be dry at night but not quite. Anyone else had this transition period? How long did it last until they were realiably dry at night and not waking up to use the bathroom? I would be happy to let him keep using the pull ups for as long as he likes but he is waking up to use the barhroom regardless. It doesn't matter to me when he is dry at night but I really need him to start sleeping better!

I think you've answered your own question there. If sleep is more important than him being dry, I'd stick him back in a nappy at night. You could always use a cloth nappy to encourage him to stay dry.

We lifted our 3 year old at 10pm or thereabouts for months until we were sure he could wake for a wee himself. It stopped the accidents and he is dry now (5, has been since 4).

Also I don't think there's a problem waking for a wee at night - think how long they're asleep for compared to adults!

I get the impression from the op that he is still in a nappy/pull up at night but he wants to use the toilet instead when he wakes and then can't get back to sleep.

How much is he drinking at bedtime?

Yes he's still in a pull up but just doesn't want to use it and wants to go to the toilet instead. He wouldn't let me near him with a nappy either as they're 'for babies' ( due to baby sister needing them)

I did read advice on another site to take him to the toilet around 11 / midnight and then put him straight back to sleep, as you suggest Iggly. Problem is he's a really light sleeper so I worry if we do that he'll just wake up and then struggle to get back to sleep, not solving the problem of him losing sleep and being cranky the next day!

How long before he will just be able to hold it until morning? Is this just a passing phase or will he need the toilet at night for some time yet? Doesn't help that friends have said their DC went straight from being dry in the morning a few times to always sleeping through without potty breaks almost immediately.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but my ds (4.5) still wakes up needing a wee at around 5/6am most mornings & he's been night trained for around a year. I also have a 4 month old dd & am still doing night feeds so I feel your pain. Unfortunately there's not much you can do to stop them waking if they need to go.
However you might be able to address what happens afterwards. What happens when he goes back to bed?

Do you have a groclock? DS has one & so we make a point of checking the clock & reminding him its still night time until the sun comes up. He often grumbles but we stay firm & remind him its nighttime & he usually goes back to sleep.

Dd has been out of pull ups at night for a while now, she is 4 and still often goes to the toilet at night. We did go through this phase where she struggled to get back to sleep but now she can go to the toilet without me even waking up.

What I did was gave her her book to look at and nightlight in the night and she eventually went back to sleep after getting up - this is what we did at normal bedtime routine after me reading stories so just re-started it in the night. Though mostly I think it was just time, I also had a baby still waking lots and I rember it being very draining.

Thanks, DeathMetal and omama. We do have a gro clock and he knows he needs to stay in bed until the sun comes up but he can't seem to go back to sleep anyway. He just seems to sit / lie there awake until the minute the sun comes up and then comes bounding out of his room. it's getting back to sleep that seems to be the problem. I do say to him it's time for sleep and follow the same routine as bedtime but he just seems to stay awake. I wonder if he's anxious or something.

We do it at around 10pm because ds was in a deep sleep. We actually do it in his room on a potty. So he never really woke properly.

Tbh you can't force the issue - he's not dry at night yet - so need a work around. A gro clock is no good if he needs the loo. It is quite hard to go back to sleep when you're awake so near the morning.

Iggly don't get me wrong we don't make ds wait til the sun comes up before he can go to the toilet! He goes to the loo but the gro clock is for after that - to remind him its still night so he needs to go back to sleep. not that he always does

Has he got something soft/calming he can put on and listen to with his eyes closed? It might give him something to focus on rather than 'trying' to ho back to sleep...the trying can be the problem!