Destructive Kids!!

[harman]

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Harman,

I really don't know what to advise,just wanted you to know I'm going through the same, my dd(5) is going through a stage of drawing on EVERYTHING, herself, her newly decorated bedroom walls, her carpet,her sister, the picnic table her slide and her seesaw.

The last straw came today when i went outside to bring the washing in and found that she had drawn on every piece of washing that she could reach.

Hence all the lovely dry washing is back the washer with some stain remover, I hope it comes out as some are dd2's pressies that she got for her birthday.

I have no idea why my eldest is like this and hope she grows out of it soon.

No help harman, sorry! But I understand. I spend too much time cleaning the floor of deliberately shattered glass, deliberately dumped milk, deliberately poured and smashed Cheerios, pasta, rice cakes, whatever within reach...

You'd think the floor would be cleaner with all that cleaning I do.

My eldest wasn't like this, so I'm going through it for the first time with the evil babe (2 1/2 yo). Am looking forward to any advice.

To be honest i don't know, my two went through a thing like that, my dd when she was 4 drew over her bed, blind, walls with a permanent marker and its still there now. I went mad, but i don';t think theres alot you can do, and just hope they grow out of it, can you not take the pens off her until she learns to stop doing it. or just let her have pencils which would do alot less damage?? harsh, but it might save your sanity.

You have all my sympathy, Harman! I seem to spend my days clearing up after my kids: the older two are just messy and careless but ds2 (2 1/2) is really destructive which breaks my heart in the garden, in particular, when he rips up stuff I have sown and been cultivating for months. Also look fwd to advice from other parents who have coped with this.

I found that letting them grow their own stuff in the garden helped the garden destruction a bit (not entirely) The only problem now is that everything we grow has to be pink.

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Wish I had a cure for ds1 4 yrs. He breaks everything in sight, even if it is an accident as soon as he disappears out of the room or he jumps in to do something himself, things get broken! He broke the bathroom rail the other day by pulling on it too harshly and trying to swing off it, needless to say it could not be fixed and we had to buy a new one. He has been told time and time again to leave the fan alone and he broke that, we had to buy a new one. "Stop jumping on the sofa we can hear it creaking now and mummy and daddy can't afford a new one" is said in our home about 20 or more times a day and this is no exaggeration and he continues to do it. I am sure he is related to Frank Spencer in some way shape or form.

My dd2 (4y3m) has been very destructive for about 2 years - deliberately rips books, squashes & rips boxes for puzzles & games, peels off anything that can be picked off on toy cooker, dolls house, scooter etc. I've tried telling her nobody will give her any more presents if she breaks the ones she gets & I never replace anything of hers she trashes, but it doesn't seem to make any difference. I'd be extremely grateful for any tips that come out!! Dd1 has always been fine - can't understand it.

My two are fairly destructive, probably more trashing though and went through a phase of chucking all their toys out the upstairs bedroom window. I made them stand in the pouring rain picking them all up then made them throw them in the bin. They were gutted at this but never did it again. They also tend to empty out all their toy boxes into a heap which drives me mad but I've learnt to live with a certain amount of mess during the day but come tea time it has to all be cleared away otherwise they dont get any tea. Luckily they are both very much into their food so this works a treat. I;ve learnt from experience and dont let them have felt tips although last week they did draw on the walls with crayons so I stood there until they have wiped it off. I think that if they know they have to clear up their own mess then, whilst they still do it, they do get to learn eventually it's not that much fun. My two also only get sweets on a Saturday when we go together and they choose. I;ve stopped this a couple of times when they've destroyed something valuable.

Totally understand your frustrations, dd had a major colouring and sticker fetish for a while when she was about 4.
Anything she could stick a sticker on or colour in she would, windows, mirrors, the tv, furniture, me, the cat!
One thing that did work was to give her something to wreck - like a stressball for kids. We had just moved house and for her new bedroom I bought one of those cheap self-assemble bare wood shelves and let her stick and colour away on that to her heart's content. Seemed to do the trick as that was the one thing she was 'allowed' to graffiti and she enjoyed decorating something without being told off.