Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

Friend over to play. Grrrrrrr.

22 replies

helsy · 19/10/2006 16:49

Dd1 has a friend over to play.
I'm just letting off steam, really.
They're both six. So far, the friend has demanded certain foods - shouting at me - has said our toilet is "too mucky" for her to use (it's very clean, actually but old), has told my dd1 that her room is very messy (dd has made a real effort with her room recently but her friend is actually making it worse), has asked why we're not taking her out to a restaurant to eat and has insisted I organise certain activities for her. So, what are the chances of her being invited again, do you think?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

LucyJones · 19/10/2006 16:50

Have you met her parents?!!

MarsLady · 19/10/2006 16:51

Breathe in.........................

and out...........................

Breathe in.............................

and out.............................

Step away from all sharp objects and objects that can be hurled!

Original poster

helsy · 19/10/2006 16:54

I'm on here calming down!
I'm only doing this because dd asked if she could come to play - we had this little girl round last year and our dd wasn't invited back, but I know she has had other children over. So the fact that she's being pretty rude just rubs it in, really.

OP posts:

MrsSpoon · 19/10/2006 16:54

LOL, my DS1 has had a few friends over and I have found so far that they vary.

One boy was very demanding, keep asking for 'treats' and didn't eat his dinner. Think he was a bit shocked when I denied him a third muffin.

Another boy was much more pleasant in general but started the playdate by complaining about how mucky our car was , then complained about the state of the road at the back of our house where we park (it's a dirt track), although he did redeem himself by saying how nice our garden was.

The best yet has to be the boy who just came in, went up to DS1's room, played without complaint, came down ate his dinner, again without any issue and then went home. He can come any time.

All these children are 6/7. I'm not a fan of playdates.

mummydear · 19/10/2006 17:27

Get the wine open . at least you can give this girl back to her mother and dont have to live with her ! Sounds a right little madam !

Original poster

helsy · 19/10/2006 18:07

Good point mummydear, except I have weightwatchers weigh-in tonight. Later, perhaps (Tesco delivery is coming between 8 and 10!).
She's gone, anyway. And reLAX shoulders.

OP posts:

alexsCURSEDMUMMY · 19/10/2006 18:12

don't you wonder what the hell goes on at home?
ds1 had a friend come round for a play in the summer and i was
he ran around screaming the whole time he was here, broke a lamp, emptied all the sand out of the sandpit onto the garden, rejected 4 choices for dinner and then ate like a pig spilling food all over the show, and then jumped up from the table and grabbed some toys-while everyone was still eating.
he keepos asking when he can come back!!! how do i get out of it?!

mummydear · 19/10/2006 18:19

I just hate other peoples kids

scatterbrain · 19/10/2006 18:33

Yes me too - Grrrrr !!!!

My dd had her 6th b'day party a few weeks back and one of her neighbourhood friends was getting a lift home with us - she decided she was coming into our house to HELP dd open her pressies !! What she meant was that she wanted to open them - fortunately dh stepped in and sorted that one out !

But the big thing was this - dd got some Barbie perfume which has been desperate for for ages - and the girls disappeared upstairs to play. After a very short while dd appeared looking very upset and we asked what was wrong and this girl had sprayed ALL the perfume all over her bedroom ! the whole bottle was empty and the bedroom stank - I had to wash all the bedding, the curtains, about 6 teddy bears and a lot of clothes that had been sprayed in the wardrobe - also the carpet has taken on a strange grey hue since all this !!

To top it all - I said "x - could you come down here please ? " followed by by some general comment about how unkind it was to do something with someone's present when they had asked you not to - and this little brat turned to dd and said "I'm not being your friend now - you told on me" !

DH took the little madam home then and we haven't haerd a squeak since ! I did think she might have confessed to her mum and I might have heard something - but nothing !!!

Last time she's coming round here !

binkacat · 19/10/2006 18:34

Could be worse. One girl DD had over pooed on the bed and tried to blame it on the cat. Nearly believed her until firstly I smelt it, then saw the poo in her trousers as well.

scatterbrain · 19/10/2006 18:35

Oh Gross !!! How old was she ?

binkacat · 19/10/2006 20:27

She was only 5, I did forgive her. But I must admit I find it stressful having other kids over. Sulking about food, the kids not playing nicely together, someone crying, me gettign uptight that they're not having a good time, etc.

SSSpooky · 19/10/2006 20:33

I had a little madam over, but only once! I didn't fancy her behaviour rubbing off onto dd. Madam refused to eat what I'd prepared for them and ran off into the bedroom to play leaving dd at the table. Was very tempted to drag her back to the table by her hair and chain her in but withstood. Then of course later she was starving and had to have x , y and z.

Felt like every 2 minutes she came wanting this and that, read me a story, I want to play with dough. I want this, I want that. At our house we have "children's soap" (whatever that is) etc. I was SO glad to see her go.

I don't do playdates any more (dd is 6), just don't enjoy them

scatterbrain · 19/10/2006 21:01

So glad it's not just me who hates playdates !!!

DD has a few friends who she has really "clicked with" remarkably one who she met when she was 2.5 at nursery and sees about once every two months - she is still always top of the list and always referred to as "my best friend" - now she is no problem to have over ! Never hear a cross word - the only negative thing I could say is that she eats no vegetables - but that I can live with !

Then there's the friends from school - one is a total drama queen who gets the heebeegeebees if she spots a cat (we have two)- then there's the one who whines like a baby all the time, then there's the one who sulks if she doesn't get her own way ALL the time !!

All of them seem hell bent on asking me for something we don't have !!! The other day I was trying to get a drink for them - we had apple juice, orange juice, water, milk, orange squash, apple squash, ribena and summer fruits squash - and the little minx said .........."I prefer to drink lemonade really !!" Arghhhhhh - what am I - a bloody bar ???

It is just so much hassle - I feel like the UN half the time !

Try to avoid as much as poss really !!

mummydear · 19/10/2006 21:13

Having two boys aged nealry 6 and 4, playdates are better in Summer and fine weather when I can just kick them out in the garden and lock the door behind them !

princessmel · 19/10/2006 21:21

This thread is funny!! I used to nanny for 3 boys(now childmind just one) and had similar probs with lots of their friends. Some great others not so great!! I can't stand it either when they say rude things about the state of the car/house etc. Or when the demand certain foods. I only ask the ones I like now. I let the childs parents have the other ones at weekends.

Ds hasn't had any friends from nursery yet , only my friends kids. We'll have to see what they are like!

Wallace · 19/10/2006 21:27

My guide when friends come round to play:

-I don't do meals

-Small snack provided, but any requests for food after that are met with my blunt reply "No, we don't have any sweets/biscuits/crisps"

-Same with drinks "Sorry, we don't have any squash/fizzy drinks"

-If a child comments on mess, I usually reply in a matter-of-fact manner "Yes, the garden is messy"

Bet you wouldn't let your kids round to mine In general I try to remember that they are just children, when they comment on mess, they are just mentioning it, not being derogatory (usually!). And they usually respond better to bluntness

scatterbrain · 19/10/2006 21:31

One of my dd's friends kept calling me by the wrong name the other day - it was "Linda can I have x", "Linda I saw your cat", "Linda your cat chased me" etc ad finitum - and I kept saying "I'n not Linda I'm Suzie" but she kept ignoring me and calling me Linda !!!

What was that all about then ??

She's back to caling me Suzie again now !

EmmyLou · 19/10/2006 21:36

Thread title says it all really

mummydear · 19/10/2006 21:37

theres one particular boy , who is actually DS of a good friend , he always chases the cat. One day I am going to creep up on HIM whilst he's having a sleep and squeal with delight when I chase HIM out of the room !!

jakeandbensmummy · 19/10/2006 21:51

This thread has made me laugh out loud (a good way to end the day!)
I had a friend who's little boy picked on mine at preschool, came to our house and chucked all the toys out of the toybox, broke several of them and then slapped me!
Delightful child...

Snowstorm · 19/10/2006 22:13

One of DD1's nursery friends (aged 4) wouldn't come out from under the table during a lunch/play-date at our house ... DD1 and DD2 were both wide-eyed in amazement and looking at me as if to say 'wow, what are you going to do about that then because we know you wouldn't let us get away with it?'. Meanwhile, I was looking at them thinking 'oh god, how am I going to handle this, shall I do something, can I get away without doing anything, oh god I'm going to have to do something aren't I?!' I managed to coax the cheeky madam out without anyone loosing face but it wasn't much fun!

I try to treat visiting children as I would my own (firmly but fairly is what I aspire to - ha!ha!) ... but with a smile plastered to my face at all times because otherwise I figure it's a bit unfair on my DD's. When they are really awful I struggle to remind myself that they're only really young and don't fully understand how rudely they're coming across.

Doesn't it make you wonder what your own (beautifully bought up - of course) children do in other people's houses when you aren't there though

Flip