3YO really scared of the toilet and potty

[BiscuitsAreMyDownfall]

So DD2 is 3 and absolutely petrified of the potty and toilet.

She knows (and has done for a while) when she needs to go, but will not go.

We have tried rewards, making it something exciting, tempting her with choosing some pants of her own liking. Nothing works.

Is there something else I can try to get her to sit on either the potty or toilet?

Everywhere Ive looked says that she will grow out of it, but Im not so sure. We've been waiting for her to 'grow out of it' for 18 months now. I took her to the toilet earlier. She chose to use the upstairs toilet and she just screamed. Even coming back downstairs she insisted on holding my hand like it was comforting to her or something. She usually walks down on her own.

my 4yo doesn't like the toilet still (tried all sorts of seats, etc, but I think toilets and toileting can be scary for some little ones) but he's OK now on the potty. basically we let him sit on it and watch the tv at first so it wasn't 'all about the potty'. We did lots of praise for going to the potty, didn't bother with the toilet option for a bit and just got on with nappies/accidents without any fuss to try and down play it. He was ok with going for wees quite quickly but after a bit we had to resort to massive choc bribe for poos (following advice from MNetters!). It did all sort itself out in the end but took quite a few months. Weirdly he has always been OK about using the toilet for wees when we are out - guess he has no option then, so possibly a bit about 'control' too? I'm assuming she is still in nappies - if this worries you then don't let it, lots of 3yo still are. My niece was in nappies until 4, announced she didn't want to wear them anymore and was dry from then on. Good luck x