reception age child crying constantly at home

[WildebeestH]

My son is in reception and by all accounts is doing really well. He is happy and enthusiastic there and has many friends. However at home he is increasingly miserable and crying a lot. He has even had full blown tantrums when be seems to lose all control. He constantly says that things are not fair. He seems to just want me all the time and will sometimes completely blank all other adults, even those he is close to (Daddy and grandparents etc) which can offend them. He often refuses to get dressed or do anything to help (and we don't ask him to do much). He is extremely oversensitive to his sister (21 months) which is sad because she is very loving with him. I'm beginning to dread the hours after school with them both. I find myself losing patience and being cross with him more than I'd like to be. I suspect it's all just part of slowly separating from me and heading out into the world. I also think he's exhausted from school. He's an August birthday so very young. I'd really appreciate any advice or solidarity anyone can offer.

I think sometimes the effort of working hard and behaving well all the time at school, especially for such a young child, is a real strain and can take all the self control they've got. The frustration, exhaustion etc has to be expressed somewhere and home is the safe place to do that. Really hard for the family but better that way round than well behaved at home and tantrumming at school.

DD has displayed a little of what you describe since starting school . She has always been at nursery but is still tired after school .
"It's not fair " is the number one phrase (learnt from toy story) and she is ignoring us in a quest for independence . She won't say goodbye to me in the morning at the moment which is horrible .
I'm trying not to get into situations that will escalate by arguing and explaining why she's not being kind etc instead . Sometimes I'm ignoring it completely like the hug refusal.
If you're sure there's nothing wrong then maybe change the routine after school so it's not sitting in a dreaded pattern ?

And what caravanista says is a great point - hadnt considered that .

My 4 yo is really struggling too. Working very hard at school, like a 2yo at home. I'm hoping it will settle with time and having very slow weekends in the meantime.

I second caravanista and weasel. We have gone back to really some routines and treating him like two year old! He likes it. Finds it reassuring and calm remains.

He just sounds exhausted- when is his birthday?

He just sounds exhausted- when is his birthday?

Thanks everyone. His birthday is the 18th August so he's one of the youngest. I know he's very tired, I just don't know how to help or when I should expect it to change. Afternoons seem to go better when we arrange playdates but then that probably adds to the tiredness. I guess I just to try to find ways to be patient and just hang in there.

My ds is doing the same, right down to the clingyness. It could be exhaustion, or a developmental stage.

My dd is a few wks older and not in school. I have found that if she has a busy day she needs to go to bed ridiculously early 6-6:30. If I don't do that it really shows in her behavior. School is a massive adjustment and it's a shame IMO that in this country compulsory full time ed age is so very young.

My jan born is tired and on days when we do loads of afterschool sport etc it's noticeable in terms of behaviour. School afterschool club is ok as less intense and they can watch TV. With a summer born I would try reduce afterschool activities if you can.