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Original poster

How do I show my 18 month old it's okay for Mum to be naked?

21 replies

Scrapmumma · 10/10/2006 11:49

Hi all,

I'm new to this. i grew up in a family that was fairly okay with walking in on each other in the bathroom etc and I want my daughter to be okay with nakedness. However, she hasn't seen me naked that often (e.g. try to get dressed before she gets up or don't get around to it!) and when she does, she's surprised. My issue is with how I should respond, to show her its okay to be naked around your family. I'm trying to act laidback, but should I make more of an effort for her to see me this way??

OP posts:
shimmy21 · 10/10/2006 11:54

er.. are you suggesting that you will actually go out of your way to 'be naked' for your dd's moral enlightenment?

I'd say you answer your own question by implying that it should happen naturally instead of some deliberate parade, shouldn't it?

TwigTwoolett · 10/10/2006 11:57

if you're naked you're naked ..

have a bath with her

my kids watch me when I'm buck naked on the toilet .. now that's an attractive sight

alcyone · 10/10/2006 11:57

I think it just sort of happens! Both my dds aged 6 and 7 see me naked, they never questioned it as they new no different. I might be wrong as im no psychologist, but i think that your child's reaction depends on your behaviour and how relaxed you are. Hope this helps.

PrettyCandles · 10/10/2006 11:57

Don't make a big deal of it. Just let it happen. Perhaps get dressed after you've dressed her so that she has the opportunity to walk in on you.

At this age my two loved 'helping' me dress - I'd ask them to fetch me my knickers/socks etc. Such a giggle for them, especially when they tried my things on (I have an absolutely priceless photo of ds all tangled up in one of my bras ).

TwigTwoolett · 10/10/2006 11:57
BettyBatShapedSpaghetti · 10/10/2006 11:59

That was maybe a little too much information there Twiglett

IdrisTheDragon · 10/10/2006 12:00

DS and DD also get "treated" to the sight of me sitting on the toilet naked.

Not that it happens that often.

NotQuiteCockney · 10/10/2006 12:01

We always bathe together. It doesn't stop DS1 (5) from pointing out, whenever appropriate "Mum, I can see your boobs."

alcyone · 10/10/2006 12:02

My girls would suddenly pipe up in the middle of a barbeque or other social gathering...."mummy's boobies are small" The worst was in front of my male boss..."mummy has hair on her winky" OMG!!!

MegaLegs · 10/10/2006 12:03

We think nothing of seeing each other naked in this household of four boys. Although I'm becoming slightly uncomfortable at comments such as "Look at Mummy's big wobbly bottom!" and "Mummy, where is your belly button?"

TwigTwoolett · 10/10/2006 12:04

I also sleep in the nude and kids always clamber into bed with us in the am

WigWamBam · 10/10/2006 12:05

Dd has always seen me naked, it's no big deal and it's not worth turning into a big deal. Don't react, don't make an issue of it - just let it happen. Don't automatically try to get dressed before she gets up, but don't try and shove it in her face (so to speak!) either.

PinkTulips · 10/10/2006 12:13

at twiglett.

my dd is 20 months and i don't think she even noticed whether or not i'm dressed. i'm bf-ing her brother so my boobs are permenantly al fresco and if i don't have time to bath her seperately she comes into the shower with me or dp. she also runs in and out of the room whenever i'm getting dressed, going to the toilet etc.

are you sure your reading your daughters reaction right and not projecting you own feelings onto her? 18 months is far too young imo to have any preconceptions about nudity, children don't relly become aware of the differnace between dressed and undressed til their older.

much more likely you find it uncomfortable and she senses this and thats whats causing her to seem surprised.

mears · 10/10/2006 12:19

Definitely bathe with her.

kittywits · 10/10/2006 12:39

All my kids see if naked if i happen to be naked. The older boys 8 and 7 don't bat an eye, the younger ones all get in the bath with me if they want. I dress and undress in front of them I suppose. It's so much just a part of life that I'm actually having to think about it now!
My advice to you is don't cover youself to hide your body from your daughter, but don't go out of your way to be naked because that would make you feel awkward, just BE and if you happen to be naked then that's good. Your dd will soon not even notice whether you are or not.
She came from your body, what's to be embarassed about?

adath · 10/10/2006 14:11

I don't think DD has ever really noticed naked or not (she's 3) if I am in the shower she comes in, same for dressing toilet whatever.
I think if you go out your way it will become a "thing" but if you just do as you always do then there will be times she sees you times she doesn't.

I am sorry but it does seem a bit peculiar to be trying to "encourage" nakedness yes be in a house that is comfortable with it but not force it. As long as you just do all the normale things like let her come and go when you are bathing, dressing on the loo etc she will have no hang ups but may in years to come be less comfortable with it and not want to see you in the bath or whatever and it may happen younger than you think but right now she has no real sense of whether naked is ok or not that adults do cause if you think about it her bum is open to the world when she has a nappy change and she has no shame in it.

Wilbur · 10/10/2006 14:15

While naked in front of ds1 this morning, I got "Mummy, you have such a nice big, fat bottom". Parental nudity not such a great idea always....

pinkdolly · 10/10/2006 14:41

hiya, my dh and I are very open about nudity in our family. we dont close the door to the toilet.. and like someone else mentioned they do get treated to me on the lav.

My oldest two aged 4 and 3 quite reguarly bathe with my dh. Which brings me to a point, when does it become socially unnaceptable for girls to see there daddies naked?

Just wandered...

fondant4000 · 10/10/2006 14:50

My dh is a little disconcerted when dd says "where's that penis thing?" and laughs whenever she sees it

Dh has psoriasis, so a bit non-naked but not bothered about dd seeing him and she sees it as totally ordinary.

She's more used to me being naked about the place, and I have bathed with her since day 1.

shhhh · 10/10/2006 17:01

dd is 17 months and doesn't seem to bat an eyelid if I am naked or not.. She does have baths with me and showers with both dh & I and loves it.
I shower every am and dd is free to come in and out of the bathroom during this time. The only thing she laughs at atm is my belly button. She is obsessed with putting her finger in it..also does this to dh..Laughs while she does it..!!

Must admit neither dh or I want to continue this nakedness once she becomes of an age..We both remember our parents being naked..eugghhh. Not nice when you are 13+..!! Our bodies are fine BUT our parents....!!

kittywits · 10/10/2006 17:50

Pinkdolly, probably when they are pre pubescent

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