I was going to add a post to the separation anxiety thread below but thought it unfait to hijack another poster!
My DD is 20m and we have always struggled with separation anxiety, it comes and goes but at times it is very bad. Good thing is she now goes very very happily to Dh and to my mum so we are getting somewhere.
But a new phase for us is her absolute intolerance of other people in her orbit, particularly other toddlers. It is making life quite tricky and limiting what we can do as she gets so terribly upset. Best case scenario is that she just shrieks at other people (passing people walking to work on the same pavement etc, so not even people trying to interact with her or in her eyes take her away) and says no no no and waves her hands at them. Worst case scenario, we had to leave a messy play class just this morning a minute after it started because she was suddenly inconsolable, she wanted her cuddly bunny and we had come out without him and it just got so bad we had to leave :( which was a shame as she would have enjoyed the messy play if we had been able to stay, she usually does.
MIL came round yday as I needed to get some things done and I couldn't do any of them because DD wouldn't stay alone with MIL...
We abandoned playgroup before we even went on tues because she was so upset before we even went out of the door. Last time we went we had to leave as she was fine until another child came and looked at a toy she was playing with and then she got desperately upset and kept saying 'home, home'.
Even shopping outings can be cut short as she gets so upset sometimes in pushchair out and about and begs to go home for her bunny.
I think part of the issue is the bunny: he is her soft bunny with dummies attached and she loves him more than anything, however I am trying to be firm about not taking him out when we go as she tends to doze off with a dummy when she is in pushchair or car (won't doze off without dummy) and though I am not remotely strict about most aspects of parenting I HAVE to be strict about her only napping at naptime because otherwise what happens, without fail, is that she will doze off for twenty mins in her pushchair and then be absolutely unable to settle for a proper nap later on, leading to hysterics about two hours later as she is so tired but by then it's too late to have a proper nap or bedtime is a disaster... so by keeping the bunny away I am obviously being cruel to be kind as otherwise her sleep suffers horribly and she is a wreck.
But the trouble is that I think she only feels secure around other people when she has him and so if we go out without him she is in a panic... and hence we are finding ourselves unable to go out!!
That said she was in a state with MIL y'day and she DID have bunny, so it's not foolproof...
Sorry for long post but does anyone have any advice? She is a very sensitive, high-needs little thing, suffers terribly with teething and has always needed lots and lots of physical affection and attention which Dh and I both give her in spades! She doesn't go to a nursery yet so obviously she isn't used to other kids but I don't know how to GET her used to other kids when she won't tolerate them in the same room!!!