Pudding rules...

[MumOfTheMoos]

In an effort to make sure that when he's with us DS(2.7) eats a balanced diet and doesn't just skip to pudding I am instigating some pudding rules.

Basically, at the beginning of the sit down meal I tell him that if he wants any pudding then he needs to eat some of his dinner - I'll say 3 mouthfuls, a bit of salad etc, etc.

Last weekend at Sunday dinner, this worked a treat - he sort of ignored me, kept playing with his small cars and then when pudding came out, he let me feed him 3 (balanced) forks of dinner before he had his pudding.

This week it hasn't worked so well. Saturday night, it was my Mum's birthday - he had some steak, some chips and all he had to do was eat a mouthful of salad and then he could have some pud. He decided against it and didn't have any pud. TBH, I'm guessing he wasn't that hungry or bothered so it worked well.

Yesterday, at Sunday dinner, he didn't touch his dinner at all, saying he didn't like it (a big fat lie, its was roast chicken and all sorts of lovely stuff that he normally eats) but this time, was busy playing with bricks as his Dad and I ate our very nice Queen of Puddings.

He hadn't eaten that much all day (he tends to go large for breakfast and then eat less and less as the day goes on).

At Nursery, he generally eats everything put in front of him, including green stuff.

I really don't want to make food a battlefield but I do think he ought to eat at least some of the protein, carbs and veg before he gets to go on to pudding - otherwise (like me given half a chance) he might just end up eating pudding!

What do other people do? Am I risking making the table a battlefield or should I keep going (on the basis that if he was really hungry he would eat some of the first course)?

I'm no expert but have a 2 year old DS. As a general rule, I don't provide puddings other than yoghurt and fruit during the week. If he doesn't eat much of his main course, I'm quite ok with him having fruit, and try not to make a big deal of it. I only really do a proper pudding on a Sunday, and he always has that, whatever he's eaten off his plate. He does have biscuits and things occasionally as snacks, although I tend to give fruit more for those too.

I was brought up with "no pudding unless you've eaten your dinner", and still find it very difficult to leave food on my plate, even now, and am overweight. So I'm just trying not to make a big deal of it, to avoid this happening to him! It is frustrating at times, though. I am lucky in that he loves fruit though - vegetables less so!

I stopped reading half way.

Why is your ds only having afew mouthfuls of his meal before hes having pudding?

He needs to be eating most of it tbh before any sweet stuff is offered.

Why is he having pudding every day? Whats wrong with having puddings occasionally?

Hmm yes I would ditch puddings altogether and if he clears his plate he can choose something like fruit or yoghurt.
Then once a week you could do a treat pudding.
He doesn't need it every night and certainly needs to eat more than three mouthfuls before anything else is offered!

My children don't have pudding unless they've eaten all of their main and are still hungry! They are 2 and a half and 14 months. Even then pudding will normally be a yoghurt; if they ask I let them have a nice pop but they don't very often ask! They do snack on a lot of fruit and quite often have cake (as I run a childrens cookery school and we go through spurts of having a lot of cake about!). If they don't eat their tea then they're obviously not hungry!

He eats at nursery most of the time so I don't give him pudding every day - usually once a week on Sunday's but this weekend as it was my Mum's birthday we had pudding on Saturday evening as well.

He loves fruit and eats a lot of that and like I say, he has a balanced diet at nursery (although it is usually two courses).

SpanielFace - I know exactly what you mean about being made to sit there and eat all your dinner and I don't want to make it a battleground at all.

Just wanted to take a temperature check to see if I'm being unduly mean or storing up trouble for later and it looks like I'm not. We will continue with no pudding unless some dinner is eaten.

My DD is 2.5 and dinner is always my most stressful time of day. 7/10 she will not eat what I put infront of her.

I've started saying to her that that's her dinner, it's all there is, if you don't want it that's your choice but I'd like you to stay at the table while DS (8months) and I eat ours.

We don't have puddings. Maybe a yogurt a couple times a week. But never if she's not even attempted some dinner.

I have never understood the whole idea about with-holding pudding. Just make pudding something healthy then there is no argument and no problem.
I never told mine to clear their whole plate. Why tell them to force more down if they are full? I don't always eat everything either!
Fruit or yoghurt was the standard pudding in my house for many years, but they got that regardless of how much they had eaten on their main course.
I wasn't prepared to have arguments over dinner times. I encouraged them to try things, but if they didn't want to, that was fine.

Well, WineWineWine, I take your point about making pudding healthy and normally, we don't have pudding or have some fruit but once a week (or more if it's my Mum's birthday ) DH and I actually like to have a pudding ourselves - its part of our Sunday night ritual.

I don't agree with having to clear your plate either - I don't always want to and I don't think it makes for healthy eating - so that's why I'm going with a little bit of everything rather than a finished plate. What I might do is offer a fruit alternative if he doesn't want to eat his first course.

If you are only having pudding once a week or twice if it's your Mum's birthday then I would offer him his main course and if he doesn't eat it clear it away and give him a small portion of the pudding. I wouldn't battle over food at all and he is not going to have the choice of only eating puddings if they are generally not being offered.

I agree with general feeling below. Make 'pudding' something healthy, yogurt and fruit, mix in granola even. There's lots you can do there.

I wouldn't with hold this, even if they didn't eat main, but there would be just normal desert portion.

Desert alone won't fill him up, so he eats most of his main, when he doesn't he's probably not that hungry and prefers the fruit and yogurt. Decision he's free to make as it's all good for him

Has he got toys at the table? This should be a no no imo