Is 13 months really 'late on the learning curve' for not sitting through story time?

[Linguaphile]

We just went to a play group this morning, and my very active 13 month old twins were more interested in greeting the other children than in sitting still. At the end of the session, one of the helpers explained to me that they need to be sitting quietly with me so that they don't distract the other children (it's a 0-4 playgroup) . I asked her if they were really meant to be able to sit through 30 minutes of stories at that age, and she implied that my children might just be later on the learning curve and asked if they sit through bedtime stories either... which they don't (it's more of a calisthenic story time).

A I being really dense for not realising that they were meant to be able to do this by their age? And how on earth do I train them to do it? It's nearly impossible with two as I can't just go chase after one without then losing the other and spending most of the hour playing whack-a-mole. :(

Even if they were 4 I wouldn't be that surprised if they didn't sit still for 30 mins of story time.

The helper is nutso.

If it is any help one of mine got an award for 'good sitting on the carpet' in reception at school so maybe their day will come in about 4 years or so!!!

Incidentally I have another who can't sit still for more than 10 seconds at 8!

As others have said 30 minutes is a long time for anyone to sit still let alone 13 month olds!
They're toddlers for goodness sake, they've just found they can run off and explore so they are hardly going to want to sit still for extended periods of time.

Having given this some more thought, I would question how they are getting the other children to sit for so long if they are actually succeeding in doing so.

I would be concerned if I walked into a setting to find children that age all sitting still for that long. The only time I have seen that happen was in a setting where to manager scared the living daylights out of the children. I ended up complaining to Ofsted which eventually resulted in the closure of the setting.

Please keep an open mind about whether this is the right place for your DTs to be cared for, especially if the expectation is that they will attend without you at some point.

Hahahahahahahahaha!

I once took mine to a library story session about 2 years old. There were actually a few sitting and listening, while mine took off up the book stacks.

We went to gymnastics instead :)

Actually, I want to know where this group is so I can take 3 year old DD and let her wreck the joint during story time while this helper's head explodes.

Yes Abbie I have a 3yo I could bring that would give her a run for her money if he was told he didn't have to sit quietly

Load of bollocks. There's not a 13 month old out there with a 30 min attention span. My first reaction was to laugh loudly at the suggestion that there was.

I have no children but surely 13 month year olds are hardly more than babies?

He's also just reached that lovely stage of pointing out the fucking obvious delightfully sharing his observations :) no matter how mortifying that may be for the accompanying adult

The playgroup organisers sound batshit .

Please go back and let your dc's explore, make sure it really winds the organisers up .

My 22 month old DS will not allow me to read to him at all. He will continually shut the book or start banging anything in my vicinity, leave the room etc etc. I have no idea why. He likes books and likes looking through then himself, he just doesn't want me reading to him.

So the nursery worker would despair of my son and probably ask us to leave as I dread to think of the things he would destroy in 30 minutes.

The other children who are sitting quietly and attentively for the 30min story - are they glued to the floor like the birds in The Twits?

30 minutes of stories at 13 months in a room full of fun? I'm sure there is a 13 month old somewhere who might enjoy this but I have not met them. It is good to want to explore at this age.
That lady sounds rude.

She is crazy. My 2 yo DD will sit through as many as 6-8 stories when trapped in her cot before bedtime or if she is snuggled in bed with us. She might listen to 1 when we are downstairs and there are all her toys to play with. When we are out and about, even 1 when she has a biscuit is a stretch. I would say she has a relatively good attention span for her age. Children naturally want to move and explore, it's completely unrealistic for for them to sit still in a play group type environment for that long. The only babies I see that are ones who aren't mobile!

Mine never sat through story time, or rhyme time, any of those things, although they did like bedtime stories (very involved though, not just listening). DD started to sit quietly at school and teachers tell me she's very attentive (year 2). DS is in Reception and apparently is starting to sit quietly. They are both huge book lovers.

Children's Centre made me feel terrible that they wouldn't sit and listen to stories at groups, and suggested that maybe if I read to them...(I'm a librarian!). It's nonsense, some kids enjoy sitting and listening, some don't. Mine viewed playgroups as social times. I stopped going to those groups and found ones hat suited us more.

Agree with all pp. my nearly 3 year old would not sit for 30 mins, no way. I would be pretty annoyed if any play group worker intimated they were behind in their development because of this issue.

Between the ages of 18 months and 2 years we attended a gymnastics group that involved starting off with circle time, singing songs and dancing. We were surrounded by the gym equipment which the children were strictly not allowed on until after the 10 min circle time. It was the longest 10 mins ever! My dd kept breaking out and running onto the trampolines, crawling through tubes, you get the picture. Then when it was gym time she wanted to do the "free play" stuff, like running around kicking a football or playing with hoops. In other words, she didn't respond well to the structured nature of the sessions, circle time, followed by gym followed by football.

She started to cry during the sessions, followed by trying to put her shoes and coat on. She was really telling me, it wasn't for her. I actually feel guilty for sticking it out as long as I did, but dd is my first and I thought maybe she would get used to it or that these were lessons she needed to learn. I would not make that mistake again!

Now a year later her concentration is lengthening, but is still not at the 30min level. I am surrounded by her little 2 year old friends, and there is a huge variety in their interests and attention span, all are normal. Your twins are fine. Not so sure about the play group worker.

What utter tripe that woman is spouting, its hard to keep little ones sitting still for ten mins never mind 30

No way! I don't know what she's expecting, even if she's really great at telling stories, but a min per year of age tops..... Just tell her she needs to try harder ;-)

I'm 47 and I get bored and restless listening to someone drone on for 30 minutes.

The reason they start schools later in many countries is because many children find it very hard to sit still and concentrate on a lesson at 4 or 5.

At 13 months your children sound totally normal and friendly to boot!

It's crazy, but I wonder if there is some official lunacy about this, because our surestart woman also told me that the reason why the 7-13mo babies were not allowed to crawl under the parachute except at her express say so was because they needed to learn to sit still and follow instructions!!!! The idea that she truly believed that was an appropriate expectation makes my brain melt.

Show me a toddler who sits still when there's more interesting things to do/look at and I'll eat my hat.