Anyone else have a worrier?

[scrappydappydoo]

DD1 (8) is still awake. She should have been asleep 2hrs ago. This is a regular occurrence - she's up because she keeps having 'bad thoughts' - she worries that the house will be burgled, there will be fire, that she won't get her homework in etc and the latest 5 mins ago - panicking that she would get one of the main parts in the school play .
She's tired now which is why it's worse but this happens during the day - worrying about all sorts of things (the drama over what to wear for book week has been something else). I try very hard to not say 'don't worry' as that is not helpful - we usually reassure her and help her to think through things logically or help her put things in place to stop issues happening. Of course with the odd moment of 'just get a grip and deal with it' but I'm now worrying about all her worrying!!
Any thoughts, help or sympathy?

Yes, my 8 year old is also a worrier. We are awaiting help from CAMHS because it goes far beyond normal childhood worries.

I don't really have any advice, but I do sympathise. It can be exhausting, because all you want to do is reassure but reassuring doesn't help.

I was that child

I think you do right to acknowledge it. I think what I wanted was for someone to tell me my fears weren't silly and to reassure me why what I was worrying about was unlikely to happen. And possibly run thru what we would do if it did happen! I was always made to feel my worries were stupid, which made me just lie in bed keeping my terrors to myself! So, acknowledge and reassure would by my strategy.

My ds used to be like this, he barely slept for over a week worrying about leprosy and checking his skin constantly. He is 13 now and we still cannot say the word Cancer in his presence. He's settling a bit now as we can reason with him more. It's weird, the stuff I think he should worry about, like getting detentions, don't bother him in the slightest, sigh!

My seven year old is like this. At the moment the main worry is burglars, but sometimes much more trivial things. We bought him a book called 'What to do when you worry too much', which has helped a bit - it's got some useful ideas, plus the very fact of buying it helped to show that we are sympathetic to him. I've also just realised that we have to be careful about watching TV when he's in bed but awake - we were watching The Sopranos the other night and he heard a scream and gunshots, and thought they might be real.

Thanks all its good to know that others have experience of this. Interestingly her teacher says she is very confident and seems happy in class and was surprised she worries. She finally went to sleep at 10.30 with me holding her hand. I'll check out that book lapin thanks and good point about the tv although we tend to watch property programmes so i doubt she's scared of Kevin mcloud!

I have a worrier who seems confident and happy at school too.

Working through the book "What to do when you worry too much" by Dawn Huebner that Lapin mentioned has been very helpful.

DD also keeps a notebook by her bed where she parks any worries before they start growing out of control and stop her from sleeping. In order not to focus her notebook too much on the negatives she has a section each day for what she calls her triumphs. It's going to make really funny reading in a few years.

Love that notebook idea. Going to try that.

Not sure if your DD is too old for this now OP but I bought my 'sensitive' DD some worry dolls (she is four) -they're from Guatemala and you can pick them up from any old hippy or head shop - I think I found mine in a charity shop - and you tell them your worries each night before you go to sleep. I had them as a kid as I was a worrier too. DD uses them for when she is worried about our cat :)

This is from Wikipedia:
Worry dolls (Spanish: Muñecas quitapenas, “Dolls [that] remove worries”), or trouble dolls, are very small and colorful dolls, traditionally made in Guatemala. A person (usually a child) who cannot sleep due to worrying can express their worries to a doll and place it under their pillow before going to sleep. Some medical centers use them in conjunction with treatment for disease in children. According to folklore, the doll is thought to worry in the person’s place, thereby permitting the person to sleep peacefully. The person will wake up without their worries, which have been taken away by the dolls during the night. (wiki)

I was also that child, before bed every night my Mum would sit and let me discuss my worries with her so I had a dedicated place and time to talk about my fears, I think this really helped me back then. Also knowing I could go and have a cuddle if I needed one at any time helped, it sounds like you are doing the right things but I would see a GP as they may be able to get you some good help.

Thanks all - some great thoughts and suggestions. I suppose my big concern is that there is something going on that I don't know about like bullying. And I thought toddlerdom was tough!

My worrier goes to sleep beautifully with an audio book. Definitely helps distract her when her nighttime imaginings could otherwise take over.