DD Bitten in Nursery

[fuzzlepelts]

Hi, I need some rational advice here. When I picked dd up from nursery yesterday I was informed that she had "unfortunately" been bitten by another child whilst arguing over whose turn it was to wash hands at the sink (!) I was ok until I actually looked at the bite. There is a perfect imprint of every tooth which is raised and swollen and this morning going purple with bruising. Obviously nursery can't tell me which child did this but this morning dd didn't want dh to leave and was really quite distressed. Nursery won't say whether the child has done it before and are really being quite evasive about it. I seem to be getting more upset about it by the minute rather than less.
What do you think I should do (if anything)?

Your poor dd!

In my experience, I really would just leave it. Having had 2 boys who were both bitten at nursery and both bit too, I wouldn't be overly converned over 1 bite. I imagine that the parents of the biter would have been informed (and probably horrified) and I can understand whyt they don't inform you who the child was.

It is a phase most chldren go through and very common, obvioulsy if it continues then it's a problem but for I would just put it down as normal nursery behaviour.

Ds has been bitten a couple of times, once quite badly and I didn't worry about it too much. Most kids go through a phase of lashing out at other kids, girls seem to bite more and boys seem to hit more IME. Ds went through a phase of hair pulling for no apparent reason which I found much more upsetting than him being on the receiving end.

Nursery staff will probably keep an extra-vigilent eye on know biters/hitters but they can do it so quickly that the staff can't always get there in time to stop it. Your dd may be picking up how upset you are by it and this might be contributing to her being upset at going back so try to be pragmatic about it. If she's old enough to talk you could try teaching her to say "No biting/hitting" which might stop another child in their tracks if they're about to do it.

Message withdrawn

You will be a very lucky parent if you send your child to nursery and they don't get bitten. Both of mine were bitten several times. I found 1yos the worst for it. DD is 2 and it doesn't seem to be happening in the room she is in now. Although her 2yo friend bit her hand the other day at her house and my friend (the mother) dealt with it promptly. I assume that your DD is quite young because at this age DD would be able to tell me who had done it (she got pushed off the slide last week and told me who pushed her).

I think it sounds unfortunate that on this occasion the child managed to get a grip and deliver a particularly nasty bite. But agree there is not much you can do other than try and reassure your DD and talk about the positive aspects of nursery.

The reason my DD was bitten was because she had her hands on her pram (DD's own pram btw) and the friend tried to release her grip with her hands but couldn't and so bit her.

Agree with the other posters - it is upsetting but quite common for younger children to bite and be bitten occasionally at nursery. Dd has been bitten and also bit a child - I actually found the latter more upsetting tbh. As bozza says, unluckily for your poor dd her biter got a good grip - IME you don't often see such an obvious bite mark.
Nursery will not tell you who did it but they will have reported the incident to the family and will keep a closer eye on the child. But these things do happen in the twinkling of an eye.
And as bozza says, in a short while your dd will tell you all anyway. Which may help you if (unlikely, honest) there turns out to be a pattern of behaviour in the child in question. But this is almost always a short-lived phase IME.

Thanks all, I feel a bit better now (as always after a visit to MN!). I think I knew I was being a bit over-protective but needed telling.
DD has told me who did it and it is a child she has grown up with at nursery for over 2 years (dd 2.8) and he is a lovely little boy (usually)I have thought about it from the other point of view and agree that I would be mortified if the biter was my dd!
Thanks for the wise word ladies . I shall just keep an eye on the situation.

Message withdrawn