Help! DS Behaves Attrociously When People Come Over

[Festivalqueen1]

Im after some good advice - DS is 3 and a half and very eloquent and precocious. He has always been excellent at sharing toys but not at sharing me.

Whenever we have visitors he acts horrendously, trying to get more attention. I nearly always have sit and play with him instead of chatting while he plays, even for a few minutes. This helps but he still gets really over the top and loud and climbs all over me or our guest.

Or i put the tv on, which gives me 20 mins max to chat.

please dont think I want to spend all my time entertaining. I dont. I do load with my DS. It would just be nice to be able to have someone over once in a while and be able to even half concentrate on them and not feel embarrassed at his behaviour.

My friends children all seem to play well within their own homes when other kids come over :0 (

I didn't have this particular problem so I don't know if this will help but when my daughter was a similar age she would act up in other ways. She would often have tantrums when we were leaving other peoples houses/the park etc when she didn't want to go which really spoilt an otherwise nice outing. We broke her out of the habit by talking to her before we left the house each time making it really clear what was about to happen (ie we're going to x's house for a play and a snack), how she ought to behave (share the toys, wait your turn and don't cry and shout if you don't get your own way straight away, say please and thank you etc) and that we didn't want a fuss when it was time to go etc. she was told that if she managed to do this she would get a sticker on a special chart when she got home and when it was full she could pick a treat from the shop. Afterwards we'd really praise her for managing to behave well and she was really proud of herself when she'd fill up a chart. If she got a sticker that day then I'd make sure we showed her dad as soon as he got in from work and make a point if saying specifically what she'd done to get it (ie, she didn't want to leave the park but I reminded her that she wasn't to make a fuss and she stopped crying and walked home really nicely). It didn't work every time but it worked MOST of the time! Obviously different things work for different kids but we got this idea from some friends of ours and it seemed to do the trick for us! Good luck. I'm sure things will gets better. Kids go through so many phases at this sort of age!

That's a great idea. We have ordered a huge reward chart to help with good behaviour at nursery so I'll take your advice and talk to him about expectations before people come, then use sticker rewards if he does well. Thank you.

Verytired has great advice, I echo what she has said and would also add just be consistent and always praise the positive behaviour, even when he's driven you mad with the bad behaviour!

My DS can be a lot like that. I've had to be very clear with him that No, mummy is talking to X, I will play with him when they go.
It was hard at first as he really didn't want to listen and would get louder and louder but I kept to what I had said and continued to chat with visitors whilst ignoring him. If he went too far with his behaviour he went on the step.
After a few times he realised I meant business and he's got a lot better.

You do need understanding visitors for this though! Useless saying all of this to them for your visitor to turn around and start playing with them to shut them up!

Ah ha! Ignoring him. If only. I think you have hit the nail on the head there. I will try. I tend tp ignore for a bit then snap at him to 'stop' or 'pack it in'. So hard not to. I will take this advice and run with it. Thanks iheartlockhard