Help, I think I've Over Praised My Child

[hanbnan]

Ive spent the last few years dancing to the tune of positive reinforcement and praise for good behaviour/work etc and its worked really well however I think I may have over done it as now she has started Reception she is really struggling to understand why she doesnt get recognised daily for all her good efforts and work. We've had lots of tears as she gets very put out when another child gets a feather (reward) and she doesnt...... additionally she has come to think she should be good at everything and gets very frustrated when she cant get something right. How do I undo the expectation I have put on her to always be recognised and rewarded and equally to always be great at everything?

Talk to her and explain those things to her, that's the only thing I think can help her, She should know that sometimes being not recognize is okay she should not feel upset easily about it but otherwise think what she must do or change so that her efforts would be recognize.

Praise effort, rather than outcome: "Wow DD, you worked really hard on that picture". Be specific: "I really like the way you coloured the leaves in autumn colours" rather than "That is such a fantastic picture!".
Talk about your own failures. Point out how you can enjoy something even if you're not very good at it: "I'm not a very good tennis player but I really enjoy being out in the sunshine with my friends, getting some exercise".
Maybe tell her that the teacher knows she is a big girl and therefore won't constantly praise her for things that all big girls can do.