DS has for ages had a pattern where he will refuse to eat if he is upset about something. The 'something' varies but is often our refusal to let him spend time / more time on the computer or the fact that the meal is not what he wanted. We never make a big deal of it when he does this - we say 'that's okay, you don't have to eat but there is no more food until the next meal'. He accepts that and seems to be fine and not feel hungry, even when that means he goes from lunchtime to breakfast the next day without eating (although he does eat an enormous breakfast then). Although obviously we aren't keen on this, we genuinely aren't that bothered about it in nutritional terms and it only used to be every couple of months or so. But more recently he's been doing it a lot more - like about 3 times in the last 5 days and I'm getting anxious about what it's about.
He's a bit of a fussy eater and would much prefer to eat the same three meals over-and-over again so we do have some emotional situations around meals sometimes. But he's not that bad and is definitely improving under an excellent new system we've been doing. Mealtimes are mostly pleasant occasions and we've never pressured them to eat, or even done 'you must eat up your first course before you can have pudding'.
I think I'm worried that he is turning his unhappiness (?anger at us) inwards and that this is the kind of behaviour that might later turn into self-harm or depression. He's a pretty 'good' child and incredibly rarely shouts or looses his temper. He has an amazing capacity for concentration, which includes holding grudges for hours on end. He's definitely not a venter and I think I'm worried that his (inevitable) bad feelings have nowhere to go but inwards. We do encourage him to talk when he's upset but he won't and afterwards is not much better.
Suggestions, insight, ideas very welcome.