3yr old - is this infuriating behaviour normal?

[ilovetosleep]

DS is generally lovely, charming, bright etc. Until v recently he was always the quiet one, quite shy and reserved and very compliant! He has recently discovered his confidence (since birth of ds2 who is 6 months). He is so loud and bossy these days, which in itself is manageable, but he is ridiculously impatient and can act very spoilt in certain situations and I don't know how to handle it.

We have been on holiday and had a few days out recently, and when we're at an event he can't just relax and enjoy it all, he gets so angsty and demanding for the next thing. Eg a fair ground - he can't enjoy the ride he's on because he's already whinging about wanting to go on the next one. It's as if he automatically assumes we'll say no, so he starts begging immediately. He can't accept 'soon' or 'later' or 'you hve to queue nicely.' He doesn't get angry or tantrum or cry or anything he just whinges incessantly. His whinging has become the soundtrack to my life - nothing starts with a simple 'please may i have' question, his default setting is whinge!

Today i took him and the baby to a car show. He spent the whole time with a look of impatience on his face - yet he got to go inside so many amazing cars and pretend to drive them etc and all the other kids seemed so happy. But in every single queue instead of being excited he just stood there saying 'can I go in now. Can I go in now. I want to go in that one' over and over again. I could sense people getting annoyed by him. Should I have just taken him home? When should he learn patience and how to wait nicely?! I just found the whole afternoon so draining and loud. He has been excitedly talking all about it since we got home but I just wish we could hae enjoyed being there a bit more!
Hope that all made sense am on my phone and I think I'm being a bit rambly!

I can completely emphasise. My DS is just about to turn three and he just seems so bloody grumpy/angry all the time. It can be really draining.

I have started to be quite firm re: boundaries, following through on threats - we will leave if this continues etc. but that can be draining too because it feels like everything is abit if a battle.

No advice just saying mine is the same

My 4YO was a bit like this on a trip to the zoo. He was so consumed by what animal he wanted to see next, that he just wasn't interested in the one that was in front of him at that moment in time. The whole day was very draining as he just seemed so underwhelmed by everything that he saw and was so demanding and constantly pestering to move on and go to the next thing.

When we got home, however, he talked of the day with such fondness. I guess it was just over-excitement.

My 5 year old was not like this at that age and my 3 year old isn't either. Don't get me wrong they do whinge sometimes when we say they can't do something but not that much and certainly not when we have said they can do something. Could it be that your DS doesn't understand that it will eventually be his turn to get on the ride, sit in the car etc? You could try talking before you go to events about how you'll get in the queues for things and how if you are in the queue that means you'll get a turn. Try and make the queuing part of the fun. It sounds like he is worried he isn't going to see or do everything. All kids go through phases. It sounds irritating but nothing to worry about.

I'm glad he's not the only one! Yes it is like he's worried that he isn't going to get to see everything. Funnily enough when we say he can't do something, with an explanation, he doesn't actually complain that much. I guess he doesn't get queues yet and I could have done more explaining about that. I think he thought that if he couldn't go on right now then he wouldn't get to go on at all. I also had DS2 in the sling so I couldn't really get down and talk to him properly like I would normally do. I'm utterly exhausted by the whole day tbh. Tonight he asked me if we could leave DS2 at home next time so that I can pick him up when he wants to see things.... something else to fret over...

Whinge whinge moan moan... yes we have it here in spades. Much worse when tired. Went to Peppa Pig world at the weekend. DD was way more impatient with the queues than anyone else. Thankfully she did enjoy the rides when she got to t GE front of the queue though. Patience is not a toddler strong point. Don't sweat it, some parents are lucky, some of us aren't! I'm sure your DS like my DD has compensating features that make him more lovely than other kids in other ways!

Some kids can be like that. My son can be (but maybe that partly because he gets so bored too easily. He is very intelligent BUT does have a mild case of ADD)

Btw, when I says my son can be, I mean he gets way too bored and hates being bored. I And he is a teen (so i don't know it is normal as ever since he was diagnosed ADHD , it is hard to determine common behavior or if it part of ADHD.) Nothing compare what is consider normal for most kids. They get bored and impatient too and sometimes it is because they have short attention span

My 3.5 year old tries the same whinging and squawking to get what he wants. I very calmly stop what i am doing and instruct him to ask me nicely using kind words. Unless he does, he absolutely does not get what he wants regardless of whether he has a tantrum and people are staring at us. He learnt very quickly that this particular behaviour wasn't going to get him anywhere. He still tries it on now and again, but on the whole, he is pretty good with it now. Be strong. Be consistent regarding your expectations. Good luck.