Compulsive bevaviour in children....anyone coped with this?

[Blandmum]

?

Dd (nt) has developed a compulsion about hand washing, with a few other quirks as well. She is 9, very bright, quirky, rather excitable. NT.

I'm not looking for a dx, just some basic coping stratgies to help defuse the situation.

Given her personality, I don't want to build this thing up, as that would (in our case) make things worse.

Thanks

MB,
Sorry that I don't have very informed advice but I think downplaying would be the way to go. I've also been a bit borderline about this kind of thing in the past and I remember being a kid and having a hand washing phase. I think my mum got cross with me and it kind of worked, actually, even though I'm advising a gentle approach! My understanding is that children by nature can be obsessive so it may not be an OCD thing developing. I'm so sorry not to have any really decent advice, but I feel for you and will let you know if I come across anything useful.

mb - ds has a few compulsive "areas" that has made me want to write about OCD in kids. Anyhow, whilst researching the subject, I found this site - think you'll find some help there.

Thanks for that.

I was also mildly OCD as a child....not at the 'diagnosable' level IYSWIM. Having chatted with my dad I found that he was the same as a child.

Dd isn't at the point where it affecting family life or anything, but she is making her hands very sore.

So far whe have had a chat. I have told her that I was much the same, that this happens to quite a few kids. And I have given her a stress ball to use when she feels the need to wash her hands.

I'm playing it as cool as possible. But any other advice would be helpful

the more she does it the more it will feedback. You need to limit it as much as possible, so say "one last time then finished". DS1's OCD is far more of a problem in his life currently than his autism (even given the severity of his autism).

I'll forward you some stuff I've been sent about it.

I used to do similar, only with finger clicking. So whilst my advice would be to be gentle- perhaps buy sopme hand cream to rub in instead as a crossover thing (far healthier after all) the reality is that what stopped me was a disgusted look from my father telling me how very annoying it was to have me in the room doing that.

not much help really LOL!

Thanks for that

I have already said, 'Ok ' one wash and then that is it. We also go some hand cream this morning , so great minds think alike eh?

I don't want to over egg this, it isn't affecting family life, but I can see that it could quite easily escalate and become a 'real' issue.

I really want to write about this - have sent proposal to one of the parenting mags I write for, hopefully they will say yes.

I developed OCD as a child around the same age - though it wasn't diagnosed, everyone just thought I was being awkward. I used to infuriate my mother as I had to touch things in a certain order and line things up before leaving a room - at the peak of it this would sometimes take half an hour. The best way to deal with it is just to ignore it and build time into the day to accommodate it where possible. Drawing attention to my strange 'phobies' used to make it worse - for some crazy reason I used to think if I didn't touch things in a certain order something terrible would happen to me. Reading other's accounts I think this is fairly common.

Moving house when I was 12 changed everything as I no longer had to follow a certain pattern around the house. As I got older I learned to manage it - but I still have to put my shoes on in a certain order and line up my knife and fork a certain way!!

She will grow out of it, I'd just give it time and don't make a big fuss about it.