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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Starting School

7 replies

Mummybobo2011 · 03/07/2014 20:20

Help, I'm having major anxiety about my son starting nursery school. He is a summer baby so will be very young for his year. No issue with toilet training as he's been dry for a long time. He still obsessed about his dummy, I hope to resolve this before he starts nursery. Took him to school for a meeting, he sobbed for the twenty minutes he was in class. Made me upsets when I went into him (I know this is bad). I work full time but he goes to grandparents and has never been to daycare. I have the summer to prepare him, advise gratefully received.

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Nishky · 03/07/2014 20:22

I think the best advice I have read is to be really positive about going when you talk to him-even if you don't feel it. Stress all the good and exciting things.

Smartiepants79 · 03/07/2014 20:26

When you say nursery school do you mean pre-school or primary school?
Is he 3 or 4?
The settling in may take some time but he will adjust and once he has some friends and is comfortable with the adults he will be ok.
Definitely work on the dummy thing. Maybe try and make it a bedtime only thing?

Original poster

Mummybobo2011 · 03/07/2014 20:44

Thanks both, he is three at the end of July.

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Jaffakake · 03/07/2014 21:37

Does he socialise with other kids much at the moment? I think that learning to be around other kids is one of the two things they have to get used to, the other is getting to know the new adult looking after them. If being around other kids is a new thing for him, that might be something you & your parents could work on over the summer?

My ds is the same age & also obsessed with his dummy, but we're managing to restrict to sleep times only now.

I've copped out & ds is staying at his existing nursery this autumn. He's not even potty trained, so I think you're over the biggest hurdle!

Smartiepants79 · 03/07/2014 23:15

Although I believe nursery to be beneficial for children his age especially in the year leading up to him starting school he doesn't have to go....
My DD is 4 in August and starts school in sept. she also had never been in day care only to grandparents and toddler groups. She was happy and confident in new situations and we had no tears at all but I still only sent her 3 sessions a week. It was enough for her.
You must try and get over your anxiety. You need to be positive and excited about it for him. Socialise him with other kids as much as you can over the summer. Sure start, toddler groups etc.
remember the nursery staff should be very experienced in dealing with this. They will be able to help.

MrsWinnibago · 03/07/2014 23:52

My DD is also a late July baby and I wish I hadn't sent her. I actually held her back until the January because the nursery let me...she was not ready emotionally at all and had never been away from me. Now I would wait till reception and just keep going to plenty of playgroups and introducing her to letters and numbers in a play based atmosphere. DD is 9 now...almost 10 but it's gone so fast...

MultipleMama · 04/07/2014 05:09

My dd had severe seperation anxiety so we started taking her to toddler groups and then leaving her a few hours a werk at daycare because I knew when the time came for her to be away it would be even harder. She's now 3 and hasn't been to group since last August due to new country and no free time, but she starts KG1 at the end of Aug and I'm worried that she's slipped back into her old anxiety as she's been home 24/7 for nearly a year.

As for tips; I'd say try and make it a positive experience, let her choice her own "bag" and "bottle/cup" which is just for nursery, make it into an adventure. We got dd a present for attending her first day, we also took her to meet the adults who would be looking after her. We'll be doing the same again this year and letting her choose her own "first day" outfit. :)

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