14 month old - high pitched scream and how to stop it!

[lvj73]

Hi all

My 14 month old ds has taken to using a high pitched scream as a way of getting attention and showing he is frustrated depending on what's going on. It can mean everything from 'huh why isn't this door opening when I want it to' to 'i want another biscuit' to 'hey mummy look at me you are ignoring me' etc.....I could go on.

The problem is it's so very high pitched and in public I can see other people turning round obviously thinking 'oh what a tearaway with a rubbish parent!' I know I shouldn't care about what anyone else thinks but it's not that easy!

He can say quite a few words which is great and so sometimes points and says there for example but obviously he can't say enough to communicate what he wants and he also, like most toddlers, just finds life frustrating sometimes so out comes the scream!

Should I be ignoring him screaming or responding or saying no?
Or is it just a phase that will go away soon? Am assuming when he can talk more he will stop (an d just have regular toddler tantrums!) but that could be ages.

Any advice would be much appreciated!

Hi Ivj73.
This is not exactly advice but a friend of mine had a dd with the same problem. The scream was literally painful on your ears. The mother used to ignore the screaming long enough for it to upset everyone else to the point of distress then give in to whatever her latsest demand was. The result was that the little girl used the screaming for the next 3 years as a manipulative tool to get whatever she wanted. Interesting that when her mum wasn't around she never did it coz no one else would give in to her.
I would think ignore the screams and reward the good bits but whatever you do dont - ignore,ignore,ignore, ok what do you want then!

Sorry, I know that's not helpful but it just reminded me of her. On the bright side she did stop when she went to school!

Ignore him. And, as importantly, ignore any 'dirty looks' or comments that you may get.

And I agree with 2ndtime that the worst thing to do is to ignore but then give in.

I had this with DS2 and often had to deal with public comments. As I live in a fairly rich/posh area of London, I had to deal with grand old (and young) 'ladies' giving me horrified and judging looks.

I used to enjoy saying...'Of course, you won't be used to any of this, as I'm sure your nanny did a fantastic job of bringing your children up.'

It made me feel better, anyway.

Thanks guys - gives me the confidence to ignore it. Gosh Bubble where do you live where the ladies are so annoying?!

The worst I have ever had was a man in a restuarant who kept turning round and giving my friend and I seething looks and then he said in a very rude tone 'If I'd wanted to have lunch in a kindergarten I would have done'! The irony was the babies were quite young and were very well behaved that day and cried for about a minute in total. Miserable old git he was!

Lvj

In public (and private) say - "please point or use your words" and stay very calm.

It's a wonderful habit to get into, if ds comes with a tale of woe about how someone hit or pushed him I tell him to use his words to sort it out. And miraculously he does.

My DD did this for a little while at about the same age, she judt grew out of it, she doesnt do it now and she is 18 months. So I wouldnt worry

Once he can commicate better with words it will stop