How do i deal with this behaviour?

[LittlePink]

Since my LO was 18 mths old shes spent a lot of time hitting me. She doesn't hit anyone else, just me. Shes 2 now and it did ease off for a while but has come back with a vengeance recently. Its not always out of anger, sometimes it is but generally its just random. She kicks whenever im changing her nappy and when we're sitting on the sofa etc. This is how ive dealt with it in the past:

Pick her up immediately with no warning and put her straight in the corner of the same room im in and say "im putting you here because you hit me" then walk away and ignore her. She comes after me crying and saying sorry mummy, sorry mummy and we have a cuddle and move on. Then 5 mins later same behaviour again.

Ive told her that's too rough, gentle hands. You're hurting mummy. And I show her to touch with gentle, kind hands by stroking her face nicely.

The other day she whacked me really hard in the head and I saw red and stormed out upstairs and ignored her for about 5 minutes. She came after me immediately crying and saying sorry but I was furious and couldn't speak to her for a few minutes until I got my head together and got down to her level and told her that we don't hit, that she hurt mummy. She apologises every time and hugs and kisses me without me asking her to but shes forgotten a few minutes later and its the same again.

We do lots of things in the day like play groups, park, see friends etc and she naps 2 hours a day and sleeps 11 hrs at night so its not through tiredness. Its just a behavioural thing which I know is age appropriate.

Im pregnant, absolutely exhausted from the 1st trimester fatigue and im finding this behaviour so draining and upsetting. Im scared shes going to kick my stomach and generally im fed up being beaten up by a 2 year old!

Do you have any other tips on what to do? I know its a phase but this phase has gone on for 6 months now.

I think you're responding in the same way I would or have done. It really infuriates me if my 2 year old does this, it was particularly bad when I changed her nappy before bed when she was tired.

Stick with clear 'we don't kick/hit because it hurts' she is testing boundaries and you being consistent in your calm response is important.

Sometimes my DD would lash out with a glint in her eye awaiting my reaction and I realised that it's far better to totally ignore and carry on and she would stop and carry on as normal too. If I got into too much of a tizz telling her off she would be even more cross. (And I'd get crosser!)

It really helped potty training at 2 1/2, now I don't have to lie her down to change her and thinking about it now she hasn't kicked me since. (2 months ago)

All you can do IMO is stay calm, ignore as much as possible and be consistent is repeating that it isn't nice and it hurts. Not that you've suggested you would, but don't lash out yourself (to be honest I've felt like it at times) because it doesn't teach anything other than the aggression is an appropriate response when angry.

My DD now tells her baby brother not to kick his legs on his changing mat!! They really do copy parents.

I don't think impulse control is fully developed until toddlers are a bit older than your DD. You're right to tell her not to / teach gentle hands etc, but when she does it again two mins later, remember that while she might be pushing boundaries, it's equally possible she can't help it!

Keep reinforcing and she'll know the right boundaries to keep once she has full control over her impulses.

Their level of understanding at 2 is to stop momentarily when told no then to continue straight away. They have no concept that no is permanent.
They will also have no concept of what the naughty corner means.
Unfortunately it's all about modelling the good behaviour which you are doing. It takes time.
They do kick and wriggle when being changed etc.
it will stop it just probably doesn't feel like it.

I think you are doing the right things. Please don't worry too much about uour tummy. Pregnancy is meant to protect babies. Your tummy is not fragile and try to avoid any mention of hurting the baby.