sudden cot refusal

[gemmac82]

Basically my 22 month old son used to settle to sleep in the evenings straight away as well as afternoon nap in cot and have a good 1.5- 2 hours. If we have had any little blips like waking in night we have usually cracked it with a bit of controlled crying.

On Saturday my son went down for bed and nap well and had to be woken after 2 hours (he did wake for about 30 mins in night which was a bit odd but I resettled him in usual way) . Randomly on Sunday after lunch he refused his nap and after about 45 mins of controlled crying and resettling every ten mins or so we just took him for a walk in buggy and he fell asleep for 2 hours. That night we had problems again and then after about an hour of controlled crying he fell asleep with my husband holding him and then was transferred to cot (last 2 days haven't even managed to do this). It seems to have spiraled to the point where he will only fall asleep in car and be transferred or sleep in buggy.

I have two things which trying to work out-

I'm wondering if suddenly he hates his cot and is maybe feeling trapped and whether its time to take sides off? Obviously need to do a bit of work around this with him to get him ready for it but I'm just anxious in case its not this and I make the situation worse. I would probably put a stair gate on his room and remove toys as he could refuse sleep and then play/ go on a rampage!

Do you think its to do with him not wanting a nap anymore? It's just weird as expected it to phase out gradually and he does seem tired but just not wanting to give in.

My guess would be he doesn't want the nap anymore. He may still need it and get very grumpy in the evening without it but maybe try letting him stay up all day and see.

About 2 months about my 19month old starting getting very unsettled at nap time because she wasn't tired. Refused to sleep and I stupidly kept trying to get her to sleep during the day and when she did she was a nightmare to get to bed at night. Now she doesn't nap at all and settles to bed a lot better. Unfortunately I think during the time I tried to get her to nap against her will, she learned screaming gets attention/her out of bed so she does this at night sometimes. Maybe don't force him to sleep if he doesn't want too. Save yourself trouble long term.

For the first few weeks DD was exhausted mid afternoon but I wouldn't let her sleep at that stage. She now goes through the day fine. She will sleep if out in the car but this has an effect on bedtime so I try to keep her awake.

No idea if the cot may be an issue, sorry. Good luck.

At 28 months I ended up googling 'sleep regression' as ds seemingly completely forgot how to go to sleep! You could try either stopping or reducing his nap, but I suspect it's just another phase, following the many phases that went before. Sorry, I'm not much help!

Agree its probably likely he's not tired enough at the times you are trying to get him to sleep anymore. However, this doesn't necessarily mean he is ready to drop the nap altogether - it may be he just needs an occasional nap free day, & he will nap the rest of the time ok.

I recall there is also a big developmental leap at this age so this resistance is probably a combination of the two.

Most kids still nap til around age 3 so you may find in a few weeks he will nap more readily again, however you may need to try putting him down slightly later than before (for both nap & bed). Around that age we went from this:

Up 7 ish
Nap 12.30-2.30
Bed 7.30

To something more like this

Up 7ish
Nap 1-3/3.30
Bed 8pm

Over time the nap got later & later (2-4pm) & less & less frequent until eventually it was dropped altogether. Now the nap is gone (3.5) he goes to bed at 6.30/7pm again. Hth

I think he just wants you. Not a cot refusal but wanting his parents.
My dd did this so I foolishly switched her to bed. After a couple of nights she did it again! So it wasn't the cot!

Our ds hated hir cot. Moved him into a big bed with a removable side so he wouldn't fall out and slept much much better from then on. He was about 20mths old.
Wish we tried it sooner!

At 22 months ds started screaming at bedtime when he was lifted to his cot. We thought perhaps he was feeling trapped and took one side off. 6 months later we finally cracked getting him to stay in bed and not muck about at bedtime...
Don't do it unless really necessary!

He also went through phases of not seeming to need to nap but has gone back to it at 2.9 currently, though we're phasing it out gradually as he's a nightmare to put to bed when he's napped.

Dd alway hated her cot. From the word go anytime we even entered the same room as it she'd start screaming hysterically.

Sitting here in bliss now after discovered toddler beds. 7 until 7 sleep through

Low to the floor and some pillows down, magic.

Oh she's one and four months.

Gemma, I saw your thread and wondered if your ds was going to be the same age as my ds! He is!

My ds is now 23 mths and at 22 mths he suddenly started the exact same thing.

He started crying for me, wanted to be cuddled to sleep! I indulged it for a week, went through hell for three hours a night trying to settle him before deciding enough was enough.

I don't agree with lots of crying so I tried this approach...

I put him in his cot, settled him, kissed him and snuggled him with teddies then told him I loved him. I then left the room.

He started screaming, so I timed a minute and went back in. I rubbed his back, kissed him settled him in his cot and told him I loved him then left again, continuing to return and resettle after one minute gaps.

This carried on for 40 mins. He tried chucking his bedding and teddies on the floor and was very upset. It was awful but I did not get him out of his cot. This is crucial.

After 40 mins he went to sleep. I did the exact same thing for the next nap time and it took ten mins. After that, he now snuggles up with teddies and I leave him fine, we broke the cycle.

I never left him to cry for hours on his own, went in after a minute increments so he wasn't abandoned but was consistent and clear (not taking out of cot)

I'm not saying it will work for u! But just saying if did for us! Good luck.