My children are driving each other (and me) crazy.

[ihaveadirtydog]

DD (just 5) and DS (2) are going through an awful phase of winding each other up. Obviously it's exacerbated by it being half term and DD being around more but even in term time the time between 3pm and bedtime is very challenging.

DS is endlessly fascinated with all DD's things (and she has a lot of them!) ornaments, hair accessories, craft stuff etc. She is patient for a very short time until he inevitably breaks or messes up something. I try to get her to keep her 'special' things out of his reach but he is very determined and will usually find a way to get to them. Also, she doesn't want to do crafts shut away from everyone else. Also have the issue that anything he touches immediately becomes precious to her even if it wasn't before.

They are ok with constant supervision and refereeing but this makes it impossible for me to do anything else (even thinking is tricky) and it's obviously not healthy for me to be constantly mediating.

They are better outside than in but DS is very reckless and needs careful supervision in garden too. Playdates are a nightmare as they are usually with DD's friends so DS just has even more 'stuff' to try to mess up!

DD is pretty highly strung and easily wound up. DS is very active and physical.

I'm sure this is a very common problem but none of my friends seem to have the same age / gender / personality dynamic so I don't have anyone in real life to turn to for advice.

Gender has nothing to do with it. I have the same issues and I have two DDs. My 6 year old is endlessly getting into her 9 year old sister's precious things.

I take a strong line with it to be honest. SOME things are for sharing and others are not...they both deserve to have private stuff and I am very clear about that.

You may have to get DS involved in his own crafts when DD is doing hers...as well as providing her with some little drawers or similar for her treasures....DD1 keeps hers on a high shelf.

I see exactly where you are coming from MrsW but it's not so easy to explain to a 2 year old that certain objects aren't to be messed with and also that certain drawers are his etc. It's a fab idea for as they grow up though and it needs to start somewhere but it'll be a battle to begin with.

I can sympathise with OP. I have 2 boys, DS1 is 6years old, DS2 is 2. They are exactly as yours are ihaveadirtydog . Everything is a battle at the moment and has been for quite some time (pretty much since DS2 was able to walk!)

They adore each other, give each other cuddles, kisses and DS1 is so so gentle with his brother but equally he has zero patience for him touching his toys. It's a pain in the arse trying to split myself in two. DS1 understandably doesn't want to feel pushed out and be separated from us while he gets on with his toys or crafts, but DS2 is too young to see DS1 doing something and not want to join in (which inevitable spoils or breaks/ messes up what DS1 was doing.)

I have no idea how to handle it myself. I seem to start the day with great intentions but as the day wears on, particularly now it's half term, I am becoming increasingly irritable. DS1 ends up on the ipad or watching TV because it's the only thing DS1 can do without DS2 trying to take ownership of it.

Watching for ideas!