Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Is 7 very young to have started masturbating?

43 replies

nikki1978 · 26/05/2014 21:19

DH told me earlier that he had caught DS (7) masturbating in front of the TV. I presumed he meant playing with his willy so didn't question further but about 10 mins ago I heard panting from DS bedroom. I looked through the gap in the door and he was probably masturbating (red face and all Shock).

Is this unusual? Should I be worried?

OP posts:
nikki1978 · 26/05/2014 21:30

Bump

OP posts:
tiredandsadmum · 26/05/2014 21:37

So sorry cant really help but DS is nearly 9 and I haven't seen/heard him do this yet

Smartiepants79 · 26/05/2014 21:42

No experience, but it does sound pretty young to me.
I know children of all ages do it though but without really knowing what they are doing.
I taught a child once about 6 and she used to rock herself against the corner of chairs. She used to go red in the face and slowly glaze over!
I'm not sure what I'd do about it. Would probably try and discourage in public tho!

cantpooinpeace · 26/05/2014 21:45

My 5yo does and has done from a very young age. We talk about his willy squeezing and that's it's ok to do it - just to do it in private, in his room & deffo not in school!!!
From what I understand it's a totally normal part of exploring our bodies as we grow.

nikki1978 · 26/05/2014 21:54

Well I waited 15 mins then went and asked him about it. Probably shouldn't have but was a bit concerned about possible abuse! Anyway I asked where he had learned to do it or if he just did it because it felt nice. He just said "I don't know what you are talking about" and carried on reading his book.

I didn't try and talk more as he tends to clam up quickly so I will see if he does it out of his bedroom again and then tell him about privacy.

OP posts:
MirandaWest · 26/05/2014 21:54

I know that I did from a young age ie about 5 or so. Was rather older when I connected what I did with sex.

MedusaIsHavingaBadHairday · 26/05/2014 22:44

My friend's son masturbated..red faced, sweating and humping the floor or furniture from VERY young.. about 4 or so. It wasn't just 'fiddling' and was very awkward to witness as he used to do it a LOT. However he soon learned that it was something he could only do in private, and to my knowledge he is now a lovely young man who definitely doesn't do it in public Grin

I would relax, assume he has discovered it, and just remind him it is a private thing.

sezamcgregor · 28/05/2014 12:17

My DS (6.5) does "making it bigger" with his willy. When I've asked him about it, he says that it feels nice.

I remind him that it is dirty (smelly etc) and when I catch him, ask him to get his hands out of his pants and wash your hands.

It is all part of exploration, and would probably just have a chat about "our bodies" such as not for anybody else to touch or for you to show anybody else.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/05/2014 12:20

you tell him that it is dirty and smelly?

Why on earth?

LeBearPolar · 28/05/2014 12:25

Dirty and smelly? Confused

Well, that's a whole psychological can of worms just waiting to be opened Hmm

Hakluyt · 28/05/2014 12:26

You said it was dirty and smelly and to wash his hands?

I hope you're putting money away every month to pay for his psychotherapy........Sad

Whereisegg · 28/05/2014 12:36

Dirty and smelly? ! Shock Angry

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 12:37

Oh dear. Dirty and smelly?

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 12:38

Oh dear. Dirty and smelly?

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 12:38

Oh dear. Dirty and smelly?

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 12:38

Oh dear. Dirty and smelly?

sezamcgregor · 28/05/2014 12:42

I'm assuming that none of you make your children wash their hands after using the toilet?

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 12:45

Of course because there is likely to be piss on them. Telling a young boy that mastubating is dirty and smelly is going to cause a shit of of problems in the future

sezamcgregor · 28/05/2014 12:49

Sorry, probably phrased it wrong - his willy is dirty.

Which it is.

He knows the touching feels nice, and obviously it's just a nice feeling and nothing sexual at all - but I don't want him pumping while we're eating breakfast!

Teeb · 28/05/2014 12:51

I think you can teach a child that it's a private thing. Teaching them their body is dirty and something which should be nice is bad might be a bit damaging.

Whereisegg · 28/05/2014 13:05

You can easily say 'you only do that in your bedroom please, and wsh your hands' without implying it is dirty and smelly.
They can be very damaging words.

sezamcgregor · 28/05/2014 13:08

Literally never gave it a second thought until now.

Definitely do not like the idea of asking him to do it in private. He's 6 - too young IMO.

elQuintoConyo · 28/05/2014 13:12

I was around four, iirc. Also used to have very 'happy feelings' on swings.
I was made to feel ashamed of it and still am when mother mentions it and giggles. Still. I'm nearly 40 ffs.

Just tell him it's something to do in private. And to wash his hands.

Hakluyt · 28/05/2014 13:51

"
Definitely do not like the idea of asking him to do it in private. He's 6 - too young IMO."
Why on earth too young? Hmm

buggerboooo · 28/05/2014 14:07

You dont like him doing it at breakfast table and you dont want him to do it in private? ! What is wrong with you? Do you want him to be sexually repressed? Do you want him to feel ashamed and disgusting throughout his life.

Newsflash. You probably mastubated yourself at that age, you just cant remember it now.

Let the boy be a boy, in private!