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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Is it wrong to help a baby to walk?

15 replies

Blueberry75 · 24/05/2014 19:05

DS is 10mo, can sit well, just started commando crawling and tried to pull himself up on things a few times.

However, I seem to have got him into what is turning out to be a very time-consuming, frustrating habit: being walked around (I hold him under his arms and he nearly runs his little legs off around the house). At first we did it a couple of times for fun. Now it's ALL he wants to do, every hour of the day when he's not feeding/sleeping/distracted by something else.

Not only is this incredibly tiring, back breaking and often inconvenient, I'm worried I'm somehow negatively affecting his development (balance/coordination) so I feel pretty stupid now for ever starting it.

The other problem is that he is SO frustrated when I don't allow/help him to walk that we constantly have a whingey baby.

Anyone have similar experience/advice please please please?!?

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rainbow9713 · 24/05/2014 19:19

I have a 10 month old daughter who is EXACTLY the same. She wants to hold my hands ALL the time and walk around. I think it is quite normal to be honest. Very frustrating though when you have other things to do.
I wouldn't say you are hindering his development at all, he wants to get about but just can't do it alone yet. I wouldn't worry at all xx

GeordieMama · 24/05/2014 19:24

My DS is the same, I know what you mean about the back pain.
I've only read one thing about it being a bad thing (sorry I don't have the link anymore) but the study it was connected to was quite old and if I remember correctly based on a very small sample. Sorry that's probably not very helpful!
The way I see it, my DS really enjoys it and it's good practice so I'll continue doing it (and giving my back a good stretch when he's sleeping!)

Bluestocking · 24/05/2014 19:32

We've all done it, and our babies haven't come to any notable harm!
However, just to give you some food for thought, you could look at this post on Janet Lansbury's website, 9 reasons not to walk babies. I found her ideas really interesting - there might be some inspirations in here that help distract your little one from demanding to be walked about when you want to do other things.

Original poster

Blueberry75 · 24/05/2014 19:34

Ah thank you, both of you! Very reassuring to hear. Do your babies get very frustrated/angry if you don't walk them i.e. because you want a break?! Or do I just have a particularly demanding child?!!

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 24/05/2014 19:38

Now this IS one of the actual "rod for your own back" things

I wouldn't worry about it in terms of development, it won't do any harm, but yes they will get frustrated because they don't really understand that you are a person with wants and needs too.

You could try restricting the walking "practice" to a specific area or time or something and just point blank refuse to do it at other times - distract or carry him or something and hope he gets the idea soon?

I think the Janet Lansbury thing is bordering on bonkers and probably aimed more at parents who are desperately trying to get their babies to develop faster than they naturally would, not someone who did something nice/fun with their baby once or twice and the baby is now asking to do it more often. 24 hours of the ever living day

crazykat · 24/05/2014 19:44

I did it with all four of mine and they're fine. Ds2 was 9 months when I started doing this as he kept trying to walk but got frustrated, he was walking alone at 10 months.

I got mine a push along walker when they got to this stage. They needed a bit of help at first but soon got the hang if it and were running round the house with it within a couple of weeks.

givemecaffeine21 · 24/05/2014 20:02

My DS is now 11 months and is exactly the same - he's pulling up and cruising and insists he walk holding my hands everywhere he can. He gets really whiny and cries if I don't oblige (although he is in general very vocal most of the time about getting what he wants). I also read the Janet Lansbury thing ages ago and it really worried me but I'm not convinced by it to be honest. He is now using the push along walker a lot and enjoys holding on to this with one hand whilst casually surveying his surroundings

Original poster

Blueberry75 · 24/05/2014 20:39

Bertie re 'rod'.
Janet Lansbury freaked me out a bit when I read it, hence this post.
DS has a push along walker which I'd limited use on as he got overexcited to the point of upsetting himself with it. Think I'll get it out again though.
DS is also very vocal about what we wants, caffeine, glad I've not got the only one.

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 24/05/2014 20:59

Push along walkers are great. I'm not so keen on the sit in walkers but the push along ones are fine, DS loved his and when he grew out of it my friend passed it on to her nephew who went everywhere with it for about a year! (He had a motor delay, it doesn't normally take that long).

hotcrosshunny · 24/05/2014 21:05

My dd did this. So much so she said reluctant to walk after taking her first steps alone!

cakebaby · 25/05/2014 15:48

Oh dear god, my nearly 9 month ds is driving me BONKERS with this, you are not alone OP! He's cruising and wants to stand all the time, crawls up my legs at any opportunity. He is furious if I walk away or put him back on his bum! I can't do it for his entire waking day though. He even wants to stand in the high chair. Just repeat.... this too shall pass....

oobedobe · 25/05/2014 18:56

If it is really bothering you then just stop after a few days of whinging he will hopefully forget (do not give in!), I did this with both DDs until I realised it was getting more annoying for me and not particularly helpful for them!

I doubt it will do any damage but developmentally crawling is an important step for building muscle and also brain development (coordination) so no need to hurry them through that step.

My DD2 ended up being a fairly late walker (18 mths) so i was glad I did not carry on with walking her round (from 10 months), once she had fairly good balance and strong legs she did walk holding one hand for a couple of months as it was winter and too cold/dirty to crawl.

A push along walker is best if they want to practice walking.

beccajoh · 25/05/2014 19:06

Get a trolley for him to push along. Stand him up next to the sofa and get him to hold on. He'll soon figure out he can support himself, or will get the hang of it!

StealthToddler · 26/05/2014 19:23

Get a walker - my ds4 charges around with a little trolley everywhere! Or holds my finger!

minipie · 26/05/2014 19:42

DD wanted to do this 24/7 too - but she was younger, more like 8 months. She wouldn't have been able to use a push along walker. I gave in and got her a sit in walker. She absolutely loved it - but I restricted use to 2 or 3 15 minute sessions a day (usually while I got her meals ready). Seemed to keep her happy. She did learn to crawl - but while we were on holiday with no walker, I wonder if that was connected? She walked at 14 months (12 months corrected for prematurity) so based on her experience I wouldn't say it delays walking.

I spoke to a physio about sit in walkers, she said ideally wouldn't use them but provided they are not in them for long periods at a time then no harm done.

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