Sleep consultants

[GingerDoodle]

Has anyone hired one? If yes are they any good? DD is almost 20 months and we have a few issues I am failing to resolve!

Check this website first www.troublesometots.com

Not hired one no although DS sleep was horrific. Is there anything we can help you with?

Millpond are meant to be extremely good

Caveat: I know my DD is not a bad sleeper; compared to many she is amazing and we are very fortunate.

My DD hit the 18 month sleep regression on cue with much hysterics at bed time. We had a few nights of walking her to sleep (1 hour at time!). We also, at the same time, had issues with her refusing to eat in her highchair. As a result we moved dinner to 6 and milk to 7 (previously milk at 4.30/5 and dinner at 7) and introduced a biscuit with milk and a count down to bedtime. She had, up until tonight, in the main been going down without issue. We lay her down awake with her dummy's and she settles (as she has always done)
However 8/9 nights out of 10 will wake between 12:15 and 14:00 she wakes and will will not settle back in her cot. We normally just put her in with us and she drops off.
I don't mind her in with us but now its almost every night I'm trying to figure out whats going wrong so I can reclaim my bed but more importantly help her get an undisturbed nights sleep!

Last night she would at 12:30; laying her back failed in an epic fashion so I put her in with us and she dropped off quickly. I tried to move her back to her bed once she had dropped off (which sometimes works) - didn't go well. I tried sitting with her for an hour (something i've never done and would rather not do) but the minute I moved she sat up crying.

She no longer asks for milk so is not hungry
Her room and ours are equally dark; she has a night light which we had started to put on time but seems to prefer it on
She's not cold as she has kicked her duvet off and she won't have a blanket over her in with us

She has a 1 - 2 hour nap during the day from 11ish - 1ish and goes up at 7:30 / 8:00, she normally sleeps till 7. She settles fine when put down normally so its just the re-settling when she wakes in the night!

Additionally on Sunday we removed the sides from her cot, in itself this has gone well but last night after going down fine she was up and screaming at the stair gate within 5 minutes. We took her out for a drive and I transferred her asleep - the minute I left the room she was up and screaming again and was still awake at 21:20 wide obviously tired but fighting it.

We ended up with her between us but she thrashed about till 22:30 - totally unprecedented.

If anyone has any ideas I'd be grateful!

hello sounds hellish when my DS was 18 months he would wake frequently and for long periods in the night. We were ruined with tiredness.

We hit rock bottom and there was only 1 thing left to try: controlled crying. Not for everyone and heartbreaking to do at the time but it took one night/2 wake ups and he learnt how to self settle.

I followed a book called sleep sense it made a lot of sense to me. Good luck and whatever strategy you take, consistency is paramount.

p.s. if you do sleep training like this you may need to refix the sides to the cot...

I didn't mention in my original post but we took the side off her cot on Sunday which initially improved things if anything but last night.. well that was uncharted territory - went to bed fine; was up, out and screaming at the stair gate within 5 minutes.

Took her for a 40 minute drive - she fell asleep but the minute her backside hit the cot on transfer (normally transfers fine) it was a repeat story.

We bought her downstairs till 9 isn and she ended up in with us but didn't settle till gone 10:30!!!

I am seriously considering a sleep consultant. I wouldn't mind CC if it worked but she is a stubborn little thing and I'm not sure my ears will take it and I'm not keen on chopping and changing back to sides on the cot.

She has learnt that if she wakes and causes a fuss, she gets to spend the night with Mum and Dad.

Which she likes.

So she does it again and has no incentive to change.

I don't particularly think you need a third party to come in, you just need to be decisive and strong. If you want her to sleep in the cot/bed then don't allow any alternate - no sleeping in your bed. No driving or walking her to sleep. She just gets puts back to bed. And put back to bed. And put back to bed. And put back to bed again - every time.

She won't like this at first and she (and you) may have a few days were you are very, very tired. But if you are consistent and strong, she will soon learn.

Good luck.

PS - Of course the other option is to decide that you don't mind bed sharing. Lots of families adapt to a 'family bed' situation with children sharing the bed. Nothing wrong with this if you like it and it's easiest for you. So don't beat yourself up if you choose the attachment parenting option.

We used Andrea Grace, and highly recommend her. She gives you an initial phone consultation, a detailed plan, and follow-up phone support. We didn't want to use controlled crying, so she devised a plan based on gradual withdrawal. It took bloody ages, but it really worked, and we had her there to support us when we needed it.

Just to add - DH and I needed a third party to help us; we were EXHAUSTED, we'd read all of the sleep books, but we just couldn't get our heads together enough to choose an approach, and to decide how to implement it.

Agree with Waffle. If sleeping in your bed is a problem, pick a couple of days when you and DH are off work and settle her in her own room.

If she had such a bad night last night, could she be in pain? Is she teething?

I also highly recommend Andrea Grace! She 'fixed' our non sleeper (no more than 2 hours from birth to 6 months) within 4 nights. She was kind, patient and reassuring. She made our world a lot better and my DS a much happier baby as he wasn't exhausted the whole time. Good luck x