Is it normal for a 17 month old to never walk in the direction you want them to?

[ikeaismylocal]

Ds is 17 months old, he has been walking since 10 months so very capable of walking.

The problem is that he will not walk with me, he won't hold my hand, if I try he just sits on the floor shouting NOOOOOO!!! I try to say "oh look, lets walk that way, I can see a tunnel, flower, playgroun...." we have reigns (sp?) but he feels the same way about them as he does about hand holding.

I see lots of my friends and their toddlers happily wondering about with the toddler holding hands nicely and walking where the mum wants to go (slowly)

When we are at the park he walks where he wants and he will wonder off to the other side of the park by himself whereas many of the other toddlers are sitting with their mum and if they want to walk somewhere else will take the mum's hand and take the mum with them.

I find I resort to putting ds in his pushchair whenever we are going somewhere.

Am I doing something wrong? Ds seems attatched to me otherwise, he cuddles me and tells me he loves me and he is sometimes sad when I drop him at nursery, he just wants independance when it comes to walking.

Luckily he loves his pushchair.

I'm due dc2 in October, the idea was that by that stage ds wil be nearly 2 and able to walk at least sometimes but I really can't see that happening :(

yes very normal (for some).

I found this article reay helpful, loads of tips and ideas how to keep toddlers waking with you nicely:

silver-fish.hubpages.com/hub/Preventing-Toddlers-From-Running-Off

It will improve if you're consistent with how you deal with it - I say to ds2 (now just 2 but since he was around 18mths), hold hands or go in the buggy/be carried (if I don't have the buggy with me), when he resists I repeat simply hold hands or buggy if he still refuses to hold hands and walk nicely he just gets put in the buggy or I pick him up - he protests initially but I've been consistently doing this for a few months and he now (usually - he is astroppy 2 yo ) walks happily holding my hand in the direction I want to go. If he starts playing up and I have to pick him up then when he struggles to get down I say only if you hold hands and he usually says yes and then complies.

The key is keep it simple and consistent. I've also found it much easier to do that second time around - I used to try and persuade ds1 for ages - don't have that time luxury with ds2 and actually it's been much more effective.

I have a 2.5yo DS who does not like to hold hands, never has. We tried reins/backpack which normally reaulted in him having major meltdowns wanting it off. I relaxed the hand holding and only made him do it when we were crossing roads, in car parks or when mummy says so as it was a dangerous situation. I still struggle to get him going in the right direction but he's fairly good most of the time, we use the ohhh look up there i can see the park/tunnell/whatever, lets have a race to get there method.

Consistency is key, give 2 options like hold hands or i will pick you up and carry you home so no park. Or hold hands or go in buggy, quick you choose or i will.

I also make sure DS generally wears a hooded coat or jumper when out as its easy to grab if he did start to run the wrong way.

I don't think it's normal at that age. I think you are seeing other toddlers on good days. Amongst my peer group I have only known one who walks nicely all the time and never ran off / had tantrums re direction of travel.

The only way I cured it with DD was to threaten the pushchair every time and be prepared to strap her in no matter how much she screamed.

DD is 2.5 now and DS is 10 weeks. I have a tandem just for the threat. She does use it when she gets tired but it is mostly used as a 'if you don't hold my hand by this road I shall strap you in the pushchair' prop.

I think it is normal tbh. Both of mine did it and hated reins. It meant I didn't walk them on pavements until 2 - did plenty of walking in the park. My ds walked at 10 months and dd at 12.

Sorry, misread your question as 'is it normal for toddlers to walk in direction you want them to'.

Missed the 'never'.

Normal. Ds wears his little life backpack (trained him to like it by putting biscuits in it ) and I take the buggy. As soon as "look there's a cat/lorry/flower ahead" wears off he goes in the buggy when refusing to go the right way.

At just 2 he's getting better.

Such great advice and thank you so much for sharing your experiences :) it certainly makes me feel less concerned and have more home that one day he'll walk in the right direction!