DD seems to be a loner at school

[bensam]

She's in reception and at the younger end. I've noticed that there is little interaction between her and other girls in the class who all seem to chat and play together. Her sister is in Yr1 and says she only wants to play with her at break times. She's quite small and shy (although not at home), sucks her fingers and cuddles her teddy - so probably doesn't come across as very approachable. Just recently, she is telling me more and more how she doesn't want to go to school as she doesn't like it but says it's because 'it's hard work and she gets tired'.
I know I'm probably worrying for nothing at this age but thought I would ask if anyone has any suggestions/point me to resources as to how I can help her?
TIA

I don't know about resources, but my suggestion would be inviting other children over for playdates. If your DD gets to spend time with them in her comfort zone then she will become more confident about approaching them and playing with them at school. They will also want to approach her and play with her.

I've noticed with my DSs that when they know they are having a friend over after school that day, they are inseparable for the school day because they are so excited about the playdate.

Thanks DIYtrainee. I'll have to try that.
I wondered whether to book a hall for her birthday and invite the whole class.

And being in Reception, at our school usually the other mum comes too, so it gives you a chance to get to know the other parents. But it depends on the culture at your school.

A hall and a whole of class invite is a great idea - but have a careful think about the type of entertainer/entertainment. Make sure it's something your DD will be comfortable with.

My DSs hate party games, so I always booked activity type parties.

I think kids often don't really learn how to play until reception - some part way through. But the school should be aware of this.

Certainly, my DS was ok-ish (might be relevant that he's older?), but others in the class weren't, and the school were set up for it - managing relationships with siblings so they didn't always stick together in playtimes, and using the 'friendship bench'. Have you spoken to the school about your concerns?

Thanks DIY. I'll have a talk to her about it. She quite likes party games so should be ok.

Thanks Zebra. I am going to have a word with school to see what they have in place as I think by now, she should be feeling happy about going.
I really noticed the friend thing this morning. Even a little girl who we bumped into and she played with at a soft play centre recently didn't want to interact with her and was more interested in the others who are all quite chatty. I guess, if DD doesn't talk so much then it's understandable that they won't play with her but I'm bothered that they think she's a bit odd (massively over-reacting probably!)

It sounds like a confidence thing. Agree that a play-date or two would be good - have them on her turf and see what they get up to. It may be that they all like Peppa Pig or something so can bond over that if you still struggle with another one over.

Also think talking to her teacher would be good. Do they not have a buddy system or anything?

I was wondering if having the whole class may be a bit much? If she is shy she might feel like it is another day in the classroom and outnumbered. I know birthdays are a minefield though if you don't invite everyone!