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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

what do i do about biteing

11 replies

starshaker · 23/08/2006 14:08

this morning dd bit me. i dont know how to handel it. i said no we dont bite but shes only 16 months and i dont know if she understands. its the first time and i dont want her to get into the habit. any ideas

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mabel1973 · 23/08/2006 14:14

Hi
it depends on whether you think it was malicious thing or just teething / kissing going too far? I can't imagine at 16 months that there was any malice there?
My ds's kisses used to turn in to bites, so I used to tell him 'no biting' but then encourage him to give nice kisses and reward him when he kissed nicely with lots of praise.
I do think though that you need to be firm with her as she is old enough to understand when something makes you upset / sad with her.

Cailyn3 · 23/08/2006 14:16

My first ds bit from 18 months till nearly three starting and stopping a couple of months at a time, what ever I did, shout, cry, time out etc never seemed to last for long. When he first went to pre-school it felt like I was dropping a half starved piranha into a busy swimming pool! He grew out of eventually by us shouting "NO!" and saying "we don't bite, we kiss like this" and then giving him a little kiss instead. Until he got out of it for good it was worrying because when that mouth went near you it was 50/50 for a kiss or a nibble!

Original poster

starshaker · 23/08/2006 14:26

she wasnt kissing she just lent down and bit my arm. shes left quite a mark.

OP posts:

JML · 23/08/2006 14:46

Hi
My baby daughter bit for a while. It was quite delibrate, not like the accidental nips when I was breastfeeding (ouch). We stopped it with a very severe 'no' each time, and by putting her down. She soon realised biting wasn't much fun.

JML · 23/08/2006 14:50

Sorry should have said she was about 14 months when this was going on. We have lots of kisses (as of course yours will) and she can see that that is much nicer for everyone. It's worrying when there are other children around though, I know.

mabel1973 · 23/08/2006 14:50

she was probably just 'trying it out' to see what happened. It is a natural urge for them to bite at that age. Just be firm so that she understands it's wrong. I posted a similar thread to this about 6 months ago, my DS is now 20 months, and (touch wood) the biting has subsided, but has come and gone with teething in the meantime, he sometimes also gets a bit carried away, if he looks like he is going to kiss another child I am still very wary and make sure I keep telling him to 'kiss nicely' in case he takes it that little bit too far.

Cailyn3 · 23/08/2006 14:55

My son was kicked out of a baby club for biting repeatedly - I only caught him once doing it there, but they blamed him for all the others anyway. They didn't like me anyway, I didn't fit into their clique at all. He drew blood once too, on my other son (easier to cope with) but still, it was dreadful. If its a habit, they'll grow out of it, it just takes time. If she does it again, just do the "NO!" thing i suggested or the variant that JML suggested - you never know, it may just have been a one off! My youngest son bit me on the bum a few months ago and I jumped and shrieked so loudly he's never done it since - think I terrified him!

JML · 23/08/2006 14:56

I agree with the idea that they are trying it out. I don't think they can be malicious at 16 months! They're just keen to try out their new gnashers...

JML · 23/08/2006 15:00

I just remembered being bitten on the bum by my son! It was years ago and I shrieked so loudly he never did it again. It's quite funny thinking about it now, but it wasn't funny at the time...

mumoftwoangels · 23/08/2006 16:07

My dd1 was bitten at daycare once and i went up the wall, demanding to know what was being done, how did it etc, they told me the parents of a "bitter" aren't usually informed unless it becomes recurrent problem.i said i wanted to know if she ever bit anyone, i didn't want her to become a repeat offender before i found out! Then a few months later when i collected her iwas taken to one side and told my daughter had bit a child! I felt sick to the pit of my stomach. Then she bit me and dh. I ask the hv about it and was told in a child of her age (18months at the time) it was often a sign of frustration as her intelligence was more advance than her communication!

So take heart it is the clever kids who bite!

mumoftwoangels · 23/08/2006 16:08

Oh, it didn't last long only a couple of months until she gre out of it.

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