Mega Tantrums

[foolserrand]

Dd is 2 in 2 weeks' time. She has always been challenging but over the last few months, she has become infinitely more volatile and we are at a complete loss.

Dd will tantrum over anything; not being able to carry the right thing in the supermarket, taking turns, the wrong tv advert.... Anything can set her off at any time. Food and sleep don't seem to play big roles in her temper, although they do factor a bit.

A bit of extra info, dd became a middle child in October when dd2arrived. Dp can't so much as look at her when she kicks off so I am left to juggle the girls and ds (5), who inevitably feels a bit left out.

So far I have tried reasoning, bribery, scolding, raising my voice, soothing, copying, being strict, being soft, being kind, being cross, comfort, ignoring... Everything I can think of and nothing works until she is ready. Sadly, that is normally after she's banged her head against everything in the vicinity.

My poor girl, she is so loving and funny but this one issue we have is beginning to make me resent her.

Please someone, give me a magic fix or tell me it's a phase that she will be out of in a week or two. I really can't go on as we are.

Apologies for typos etc, my phone is playing up.

My dd is 2 and gets herself into a right state especially when tired or hungry. So I keep her well stocked up (snacks) and try and make sure she gets a decent nap a day. When she does get into a tizz, I stay with her and offer her a cuddle to calm her down but mainly just stay with her as she gets overwhelmed.

Dd has problems with food so is still mostly bf. She will start at least 5 times a day, each can last between 45 minutes to 3 hours. I can't leave the other two for that long.

I feel for you. Ds is 2.5 and will lie on the floor and cry and shout. He can't be consoled and will say "don't look/talk/touch me" if I try. I now let him get over it and then change the subject. He also throws himself about, banging his head in the process. Then he has more to cry about.

I'm hoping this phase will pass soon, its been months.....

It's hard not to become resentful. Its very stressful. If you can get a few hours away do try to. Your dp may have to get stuck in with what ever strategy you use.

ds 7 threw some mega thrombos around that age. He is the child who had plonked himself in the middle of the pavement and refused all attempts to get him to move, dh and I are walking away (there is no point engaging) as he is screaming his lungs out with passers-by wondering what is the matter. He is our second (difficult) child and so we are more matter-of-fact with his tantrums.

He grew out of it. He still does get his knickers in a twist and the usual solution is to leave him until it blows over. I love his strong character and sense of justice (mostly perceived unfairness). My boy will go far

So it ends? Or at least calms slightly? Okay then. I can get through this.

What problems with food? Maybe that's why she is so cranky?

She struggles to eat with a lip tie and big abscess in her mouth. As I said, she is still breast fed mostly on demand so is rarely hungry, she just doesn't eat much proper food. We are getting both mouth issues dealt with over the next few weeks.

I would suspect that's why the way she is :(

Cuddles all the way. You don't have to give in but you can cuddle to help her feel safe.

How did you manage to keep her well fed all the way thru end of pregnancy? Normally the milk dries up hugely in last 3 months. Is she breastfeeding now more than she was last September? Almost fully feeding an 18 month old is hard work at best of times, never mind when you're growing another baby.

(3 hour feeds by a big toddler with full teeth, I can't begin to think how sore my nipples would have been)

I've been blessed(?) with a decent milk supply. She has hugely upped her intake since dd2 came along. I'm pretty sure it's because she doesn't want to miss out!