How to get DD to listen?

[ThePippy]

Background: DD is in reception, but very young in that she only turned 4 in the August before reception started. Most of the class are early school year birthdays (so Sept - Dec) and therefore turned 5 soon after school started. The difference in maturity has been obvious from the start.

So, I attended a parents evening this week where I was told academically everything is going great, and independence is really coming on fantastically well, but big problem is listening and following instructions when asked (not at some point later when she chooses) and that it causes problems is class as DD is constantly needing to be told again and again when classmates have already started next thing.

There is no issue with hearing, but at home she is the same and we often end up getting quite cross with her before requests are carried out.

We have been working on this using 123 method and depending on levels of tiredness have had some success, but I was assuming this was just an age thing and would over time with encouragement get better.

Teacher has made me feel it is unusual because "by now two terms in" we expect most children to have understood the routine and what is expected. What do you think?

How do you know there are no hearing issues?

Just because once you get her attention she can clearly hear well, and even admits she does not comply to requests because she wants to keep doing what she is doing.

OK. She sounds like my ds - he's 4 but not at school just preschool.

At home I have to work with him to get him to do stuff e.g. ds if you want x then do y. Sometimes I give him a bit of time as we dont always have yo go at my pace. It usually means we are both calmer and the end result is the same. E.g. I was trying to get him out of the house and he was olsging with toys. He kept insisting on doing something so for once I let him and he came to the to the hallwsy to get ready eventually then shocked me by saying "sorry for taking a long time mummy, I was just getting my toy"!

So choose your battles. Also your teacher must have tactics for dealing with this?

Thanks. Yes I think you have hit the nail on the head with the pace thing, but unfortunately we do have a schedule we need to keep so while I give as much as I can, there comes a tipping point where I just have to say enough is enough and get tough on her. I can't begin to start on how many battles we choose to let go, but some just have to be faced.

I'm sure the teacher has a strategy, I guess I was just meaning that I went in knowing this about my child and thinking it was a normal thing we were working on, and came out feeling like it was a major issue and something quite abnormal "by this stage" in the year.