Can a toddler suck his thumb too much?

[eggybreadandbeans]

Hi there

Would be grateful for some insight on ds's thumb-sucking habit ...

Ds (25 months) has sucked his thumb since he was six months old, at bedtime only, to get to sleep. It was exclusively a sleep association thing, and I was more than happy with this.

In the past month or so, ds has been sucking his thumb lots throughout the day - while playing, watching TV, pottering, etc.

We moved a few months ago and have been a bit flustered/stressed on and off since (dodgy builders ... who'll be coming back ), both of which may be to do with ds's increased thumb-sucking. And he is due more molars any time now. And since the move, ds hasn't slept so well, so he is more than likely (over) tired. So there are some logical possible reasons.

Ds has lots of love in his life and attention from me, dp and all his grandparents (who are local). He seems happy a lot of the time, and says he's happy when I ask how he's feeling - but because of the increased thumb-sucking, I suppose I'm worried that ds, for whatever reason, may be feeling insecure/unhappy, and needs the all-day comfort of his thumb.

What do you all think?! Anything to be concerned about?

Thanks

EBAB

EBAB

you are such a sweetie

you care for your little boy so much, it shines from every post you write. I think if he needs to suck his thumb a bit more to deal with any extra stress that is a great way for him to give himself a little extra comfort.

I think being 25 months old is of itself a very stressful time. You can suddenly achieve so much - but are allowed to do so little. You have the whole world to explore - but still need to run back to babyhood from time to time.

My own ds went mad for breastfeeding at this time and a lot of it would be at slack moments in the day - if I sat down, if we were just chilling out, etc, so I think boredom and habit also plays a part.

I really don't think you need to worry....but I know that you will go on being vaguely concerned and I love you for it

Ds(17mths) has sucked his thumb since he was really small. He mainly does it at sleepy and quiet times, but at other times of the day too. He also has his raggy (muslin cloth) when he's sleepy and he likes to have it near him or to hold it when he has his milk.
I think its a comfort and security thing.
I sucked my thumb until I was about 14 and dh sucked his thumb until he was 16!

Thanks, ladies.

Franny - very sweet message. We are still co-sleeping by the way, and by and large, I adore it. The one thing that drives me crazy is how long it now takes ds to nod off - tonight: 1 hour and 40 minutes, with me laying there fretting over the things I need/want to do. Any tips? I think I need to learn meditation! But the snuggles are lovely

Yes, there have been a lot of changes lately. We try to give ds quite a bit of control and choice-making, advance notice of plans, etc, but you're right, there are still frustrating limits for them around this age (e.g. ds loves rolling balls down our drive, but we have no gate yet, so it's an absolute no-go - cue tears). I wondered about boredom, too, since ds didn't suck his thumb at Nana's yesterday or at a play mate's today - but I just can't play all day; there are other bits I need to do at home too. Is it a good thing for them to experience a bit of boredom? Hmm ...

Ds's been on a really steep developmental curve lately - we are in awe at the concepts he understands and can articulate, his vocabulary and how clearly he talks. There's such a lot of learning going on - maybe Tom Thumb, as he is affectionately known, represents that necessary retreat to babyhood, as you say. Hope that's all it is.

Bursting Bug, thanks for your post too. I hope I didn't sound anti-thumb sucking in my original post; I'm not. I sucked my thumb until I was six, too. I think it's a great way to comfort yourself - your thumb's always there, and in your control. My concern is more to do with the huge increase in ds's thumb-sucking lately, and what that may represent, if anything - i.e. insecurity/unhappiness.

Am hopeful it's all just as Franny said.

Thanks again, girls.

EBAB

If you can remove any of the stresses from his life, then do. But I bet you can't, or not much of it, anyway. Sadly, it's normal (and perhaps even desirable) to experience stress and tension in our lives, even age 2. If it was anything serious you would be noticing a lot more worrying behaviour than thumb sucking IMO. I think learning how to cope with mild levels of stress is part of becoming a fully rounded adult, and learning how to self soothe is a useful skill. Just make sure you are offering lots of soothing and reassurance as well - which I am sure you are.

Apart from anything else it is a very normal physiological need for young children to want to suck something a lot of the time - even toddlers and preschoolers.

(oh if you are really bothered you could read him StrewelPeter where the Tailor comes with his giant scissors to cut off the thumbs of Little Suck-a-Thumb - JUST KIDDING)

My dd who is three and a half and has always sucked her thumb. I asked the dentist about the implications of this and he said that while they were only baby teeth it wasn't really a worry. But I should try and get her to reduce the amount of time she spends sucking it by the time her bigger ones start coming through.