DD (2.5) keeps pooing in bed please help at wits end!

[whereisthewitch]

DD is still in nappies. Up until about 6 months ago she was a daily pooer, mainly in the morning or early afternoon. Then she became a little less regular and for the past 3or 4 weeks she keeps going at about 10pm every other night while she is in bed. It's only when DH goes in to check her before bed do we discover she has gone (you can smell it despite her door being closed) and she is still fast asleep. I checked her at 9 before I came to bed and there was no poo.
So we have to change her which wakes her and makes her all upset. I honestly think she is in such a habit of this now that she's only ever going to do this at night which completely stinks out the upstairs of our house, upsets her, frustrates me and makes me very worried that potty training her is going to be a nightmare :(

can anyone give me any advice? I've calmly explained to her during the day that she has to do her poos in the day, but I lost it tonight and told her off which I know is wrong and it made her even more upset. I'm currently pregnant and have hypermesis so trying to change it and subsequently sleep in the stinking air afterwards is making me vomit (our bedroom is right beside ours). How do I train her to poo during the day?

TIA

Aw. It could be stress, you being really sick.

My bro did this a lot, he was a very stressed kid.

Best not to make a fuss, be all it's ok, let's clean you up.

Don't go down the poo anxiety route, my ds was a poo with holder, boy that worse, I would have given anything to see poo, in bed or otherwise.

I am sure it will pass, if you don't stress it.

Thanks Elderberri I know what you mean she has had to see me pretty sick these past few months. She doesn't seem overly stressed during the day, perhaps a bit clingier but I put that down to the fact I have been so ill.
I don't want to give her any anxiety over pooing and on the rare occasion she does it in the day now I praise her and tell her well done for doing a poo. I'm just afraid this is going to become a regular thing if she trains her bowel to do it in bed only and some night if we come to bed early we will miss it and she will lie in it all night incurring horrendous nappy rash and waking us at 4.30am and not going back to sleep which is a common situation.

I can tell if she is going to do it because she breaks wind most of the day, I try to encourage her to poo but she just won't!

My teen does my head in, he will actually come. Into the bedroom after 10pm and say 'need a poo' ....night time pooer.....why does he tell me, next year he can get married, but he notifies me of poo visits..lol.

You could up her water in the day, or up het fruit to see if it moves things in the day, try giving het a small amount of undiluted orange juice at breakfast.

From the nightmare that was THREE years of going every 6 days, the only way we fixed it was no poo talk, no asking, no bribing.....no reasoning, just letting them relax about it.

You dd could be holding during the day, and then when she relaxes at night it comes out, that's common for holders.

I know it's frustrating but she is not in control of this. She is not deliberatly trying to train herself to poo at night. I don't know about anybody else, but when I gotta go, I gotta go. Getting cross with her raises everybodies stress levels. Your situation is not her fault or her problem.

It sounds like I'm having a go, I'm really not, I have a 5 yr old who I have to lift to take to the loo after midnight everynight. If I skip it she wets the bed, If I do it earlier, she wets the bed. So I stay up after everyone else is asleep so I can take her. I used to get cross and stressed but eventually figured that I had her and there is nothing in the world I wouldn't do for her and of all the "poop" I had to deal with during potty training lifting her isn't a biggie.

So my advice, just remember how much you love her and how much she needs you, take a step back. relax and get on with it. she will get past this. I wouldn't even mention day time poo's just be cool man, it's just a poo. No fuss, day or night, good or bad. It is afterall the most natural thing to do. Instead make a fuss of all the other wonderful things about her!

Double I know I felt awful for telling her off it was just loss of temper on my part because it's so frustrating!
I hope you are right and she gets past it naturally, she's currently snuggled up beside me in bed so she clearly doesn't remember!

Elder she eats lots of fruit and veg already, but I'll try the orange juice in the morning idea.
I know that I shouldn't stress, it's just something I'm finding hard to deal with myself feeling the way I do and as you all know toddler poos are noxious and it's bad when you can't open a window afterwards :)