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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How do you feel about nursery for babies?

21 replies

MamaPingu · 23/01/2014 17:59

I am starting university in September and it's looking like I'll be able to have mainly family looking after DS.
He will be 1 when I begin the course, what do you think to me putting him in nursery a day a week just for the sake of meeting other babies and being away from me?

To me it sounds as though it'll do him good to start getting used to being around other children as he is one of the only babies in the family and is always with adults.
I thought one day a week isn't much and is a gentle introduction ready for when he eventually starts full time

Is there anything I'm overlooking or negatives I need to take into account?

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NormHonal · 23/01/2014 18:05

Both my DCs started nursery younger than that and coped well. With DC2 I wasn't even working, we decided to put him in nursery one day a week as a way to get more contact with other children, having moved area since DC1.

Original poster

MamaPingu · 23/01/2014 18:09

It just sounds like a win win situation he can go socialise and I can do uni work!

OP posts:

Flexiblefriend · 23/01/2014 18:14

I did that with DD and she thrived on it. I have heard other people say their DC's struggled to settle going just one day a week though. I guess it depends on the child.

alliswell2 · 23/01/2014 18:18

Had my child in nursery briefly when he was only 6 months old. It wasn't a good idea. I don't think babies benefit from a lot of noise and boisterous toddlers. He slept badly and was hard to settle. I think most babies are happier in a family home environment with more one on one attention. I couldn't do that myself but found a very good child minding who didn't take many children and it was better. My child's sleeping improved dramatically and he was calmer. I think research on young babies and the best environment for most would support this.

insancerre · 23/01/2014 18:19

He doesn't need to go to nursery to socialise with other children at such a young age, however, if you need him to go to nursery so you can study, then that is a perfectly good reason to send him.
A lot of babies do struggle to settle into nursery whn they only attend one day a week, merely because it is such a long gap in between going. It will take them longer to settle than a baby who attends 5 days a week.
2 days would be better.

Only1scoop · 23/01/2014 18:24

Dd is an only child and I'm not into groups etc so wanted her to be around others....and get a little time for moi Nursery has been amazing. She started at 9 months for two afternoons a week and thrived.
She seems so much more sociable at 3 than friends children who have never been to nursery. Try it and see how it goes....good luck

Mintyy · 23/01/2014 18:27

Very young children do not want or need to socialise with other children until they are at least two, so don't feel you have to put him in nursery one day a week to facilitate that.

drawohamme · 23/01/2014 18:35

We put our DS into nursery 2 afternoons a week from 5 months so he could get used to it before I went back to work. I looked at a few before I picked one and eventually went for one with other babies about the same age and the right kind of toys. He's loved it. It's a small group - maybe five babies between 6m to toddling and I'm sure it's helped him learn skills from watching older babies.

Original poster

MamaPingu · 23/01/2014 19:03

Do you think two afternoons would be better for settling in? Instead of one full day?

OP posts:

Jaffakake · 23/01/2014 21:01

My nursery told me & I've seen it myself that kids find it a bit harder to settle after 1. My lo went to nursery at 10 months & we didn't have any problems really. It's more about them getting used to being away from you really. If you can afford it I would.

Original poster

MamaPingu · 24/01/2014 18:51

He spends time apart from me several times a week with other family members. Will that help him do you think or is it more about him being away from one on one care?

OP posts:

Goldmandra · 25/01/2014 13:32

It depends on the nursery. If it's small and home-like with consistent staff who build good attachments with the babies and the key person system works properly it shouldn't be a negative experience.

Children of this age don't interact much with their peers. They do their learning by interacting with adult carers.

If you want time to work uninterrupted and can find good childcare, go for it but don't do it for his benefit because it won't be. Do you have any family who could step in to give you some longer periods to work?

LeBFG · 25/01/2014 16:36

Very young children do not want or need to socialise with other children until they are at least two amazing how people can be so categorical about these sorts of things.

No one knows my child like I do: they don't know what s/he wants or what s/he needs. I have an 11mo at the moment and she spends a lot of time looking, squealing and basically interacting with other children esp of similar age to her. She enjoys it. Previous child didn't at that age.

OP, many, many babies are happy at nursery from one and often are fine much younger. If anything, I would be worried that one day a week will not be enough to develop the habit being dropped off and picked up. Just a suggestion.

IShallCallYouSquishy · 25/01/2014 16:46

My DD started with a CM one day a week at 1 while I went to work and is now 20 months. I'm About to start mat leave for number 2 and she will continue going one day a week. Her confidence grows and grows and she is no longer my piece of Velcro that cries at anyone other than me.

I'm not even considering stopping her going even though technically is won't need childcare.

Charrin10 · 25/01/2014 19:23

Hi, my mum looks after my little boy in the week and takes him to classes and swim class but at the beginning of jan he started nursery for 3 hours 1 afternoon a week. He is 9 months. We picked a small nursery (basically a converted house) and he is in a room with 2 - 3 other babies around his age and they often go downstairs with the older children / outside with them. We will soon be extending it to 2 afternoons a week but we can already see a big difference, he is confident, happy and interacts more with other children at his other classes and I think nursery has benefited him greatly. I prefer 2 afternoons rather than a whole day as his routine isn't messed up I.e with naps as he is hard to settle when he's not at home.

GirlWithTheDirtyShirt · 25/01/2014 19:26

DD was at nursery full time at 10 months. She has always loved it. She's social, independent, healthy and happy.

MimsyBorogroves · 25/01/2014 19:30

My DS1 went to nursery at 9 months because I had to go back to work. He is sociable, happy and managed a move of area/nursery and then into preschool and school with no difficulty. He absolutely thrived - but that's also because of his personality. The only negative for me was that I found weekends absolutely exhausting - he did 8-6 5 days a week so on weekends if we stayed at home he absolutely climbed the walls as he was used to constant stimulation. I'd say that's only changed in the last year (he's now in Y1 at school)

DS2 is a different kettle of fish. He's quite introverted and self reliant and likes his own space and to pootle around at home - but I'm in a situation now where I don't work. He's now 2 and has just started 2 mornings a week at pre school to try to ease him in and help his sociability. It's been quite difficult, but he's starting to like it more.

There are massive pros and cons for any choice - but I don't think nursery for a babyhood is as bad as the media would have you believe.

EdithWeston · 25/01/2014 19:30

One day a week might be hard to settle.

Mine started between 6 and 9 months, and always at least 3 days per week.

You need to make up your mind what you think is the best arrangement in your circumstances and then just do it. If your baby doesn't settle, then change it all. We're all just making it up as we go along.

redcaryellowcar · 25/01/2014 19:36

i have heard friends say one day a week was tricky to settle into, maybe worth considering two mornings if you could get family to collect, especially as dc will likely sleep after lunch, so your family could collect then let them nap and then entertain before giving them tea etc. might also be worth considering days, as far as i understand you pay for bank holidays so maybe worth avoiding a regular Monday if possible?
as for do they need to go to socialise, i don't think they need to, but it would probably be worth lining up some groups and activities for your dc to do with whoever is looking after him?

jumperooo · 25/01/2014 19:44

My DD started nursery at 1yrs old, just one day a week. She loves it, she's nearly 16 months now. They said its often hard for babies to settle in for just one day and there's no other kids there that have done it so I was fully expecting to have to do two half days, but to their surprise she settled in really quickly. A lot depends on the personality of the child I think, she's always been happy to go to anyone and was an early walker which I think boosted her independence. She's still one of the youngest there as our nursery only takes them from 12 months and its small, only 20 children and 8 key workers, so she gets lots of interaction.

Chipandspuds · 25/01/2014 19:50

I think 1 day a week might be harder to settle into as a week is such a long time to a child, I think maybe two mornings/afternoons a week might be better?

Fwiw DS started nursery two days a week aged 13 months. It did take him a while to get settled, but a lot of that was because he was teething and was producing one new tooth a week for the first 8 weeks of nursery! He enjoys nursery overall I'd say although I sometimes feel guilty it's quite a long day for him (8.15am-5.45pm) whilst I'm at work.

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