HELP-17mth DS turning into a bully

[SANA]

DS has always been a bit hyper & very sociabe with other kids, he gets along with most of them without any problems and can play really well with kids younger & older then him

A couple of weeks ago at a toddler group he just wouldnt leave a older boy ( of about 3) alone and kept trying to pull his hair & scratch his face for no apparent reason. It was really embarassing as the older kid started crying and stayed with his mum. I had to physically restrain my DS from hittig him again. He was fine with the other kids & i left it as a one off incidence. He however did it again yesterday to the same boy and another girl ( again older then him) but he would play fine with other kids. I am not sure what brings this on as DS is not after any particular toy, he is just being aggressive & the more I say no, the more he does it. He gets lots of attention form me so i dont think this is it....hes at nursery all week and I have asked them about this and they said he doesnt behave this way at the nursery although he does sometimes get to excited

I cant think where he is picking this behaviour up from or whats bringing it on or even how to deal with it

I am just worried that this is going to become a pattern of behaviour and I want to put a stop to it now

any ideas?

I think this sort of thing is pretty normal at this age. I would try to watch out for what triggers it, so you can be ready, and maybe divert him? (older kids is worrisome ... any chance any older kids are picking on him at nursery?)

That being said, I would be inclined to stick him in the pram and leave the group immediately if he does this sort of thing.

No idea what's causing it, but I bet the children he's attacked will do their fare share of attacking at some point. All you can do, IMO, is him clearly that this is wrong (I guess 'NO' or 'STOP' at his age is enough), make a fuss of the injured child (so he sees you don't get attention for being naughty, the victim does) and remove him from the situation, apologising to other parents/children. Think the important bit is to remove him so other parents know you are taking it seriously and he knows there are real consequences to behaving like this.

Ds ran into a child behaving like this at toddler group a couple of times - really shocked me but would have been fine if parents had made it clear they were stepping in and taking it seriously.