Toddler bedtime tantrums......HELP!!

[Sunnydaze1982]

My DS is 2 and 9 months and for the past 10 nights has started to refuse to go to bed...declaring he doesn't like sleepy time anymore!

I've tried getting cross and I've tried talking to him about it. Last night I stayed on his bed feeding dd (4 months) until he went to sleep as my husband wasn't here and she was crying. I'm breastfeeding her so it make things difficult at bedtime.

This evening he went through every excuse in the book but this evening I spent an hour putting him back to bed while he screamed the house down. Distressing for everyone! I remained calm and although he was tough to break I almost got there, until my husband took over and gave him a cuddle until he went to sleep (aughhhh that was the one thing I said he couldn't have until the morning as it was bed time!!).

Anyway has anyone any ideas as to what to do as I'm really struggling with this. I hate hearing him scream and beg, it breaks my heart. I know he is overtired but it's catch 22.

Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you from one exhausted and upset mum.x

You have my sympathy! No real advice but hopefully someone can help. My DD is 2.7 and same thing, for the last 3 nights has been a pita about bed time, which is out of character for her. Every excuse in the book, I need a poo being her favourite. She does have a pull up on but has started taking it off plus pj's if left to her own devices. Or then having a poo in pull up and putting her hands in it! She says she wants her bedtime song, you start singing it, she shouts 'noo mummy'. I say 'right I'm off then, see you in the morning etc' cue crying, shouting, throwing things. Nightmare! Maybe there's something in the air?? I just keep thing, it's just a phase, it will pass! It better had, I'm 29 weeks pregnant! X

I think you are right about there being something in the air! It's comforting to know I'm not the only one struggling with a toddler who has its own ideas. I hope you get her bedtimes sorted before baby arrives. It's hard work being pregnant with a toddler, it's actually easier once the baby is born!!

That's good to know! she was actually a lot better last night, not sure that I did anything different to normal though!! Good luck

I'm afraid we do the cry it out technique, leaving lullaby music on loop. DH and I do find it really stressful, but on queue, 5 minutes timed and DC is out for the count. I swear its the music that calms her and gives her something to concentrate on. She's 20months and goes through phases of sleeping brilliantly then throwing us a curb ball that actually nope, I'm gonna fight it. I'm 30 weeks pregnant, so a relief to hear that it's easier with baby present than pregnant. My toddler had an absolute melt down earlier about putting shoes on, it was horrible and I swear the neighbours must think awful things of me, but alas you can't reason with a toddler! Hope your DC sleeps better soon

This is happening to me too. I also have a 4 month old I am ebf. Toddler used to go to bed no probs, self soothe, in bed 7pm-8am. Now she is sometimes up at 11pm. Keeps getting out of bed, takes her nappy off, more stories, a drink, a cuddle - always something! Have tried to anticipate her needs eg teddy, blanky, drink all by her bed in case she wants them. Its been going on about 3 months. Also at the end of our tethers! I too am usually alone in the evening as dh gets back about 8-9. I feed ds on her bed while reading stories and trying to be calm but doesn't work. She cants stop talking or fidgeting! Our issue is she gets out of bed over and over. Can't do 'crying it out' as she just gets out of bed.

Do they sleep in same room? Mine do now as she refused to sleep in her own room suddenly - fear of being left out I think. We just new trying new things in the hope something works. Eg eat tea early so she has done her poop before bed, no telly an hour before bed, calm reassurance, music, story books that feature bedtime routine. Nothing works for us. I think really we shoukd go back to cot but i think we've left it too late. Just try everything and see what may work for you. Good luck!

I totally get the neighbour thing, I popped in to see mine earlier to explain! She said she hasn't heard anything...clearly she is too polite to say!

No they don't sleep in the same room fortunately. 4 Monty old is in with me but will have her own room at 6 month. It must be so awful doing bedtime routine without dh there, I had to do it for one night and I don't know how I got through it. My DS is the same, straight out of bed screaming! Not just at bedtime but throughout the night.

My health visitor advised the gradual withdrawal method which we started last night (it took two hours). Dh is up there not and I can hear a lot of bouncing around. I'm bf'ing with dd downstairs, feeling very anxious!

However- earlier my DS complained of an ichy bum and low and behold he has threadworms which could be causing the disturbed sleep and getting to sleep issues. It would make sense, although maybe I'm clutching at straws!!

I hope things get easier for all of you soon because it's a total nightmare, I feel your pain!