please stop crying !!!

[Nomi101]

hi my 4 month old daughter doesn't stop crying when it comes to bed time. we do the same with her every night so no change but after I give her, her last bottle and put her down she'll start screaming, its not colic because the minuet I pick her up she'll stop. So I let her settle down on me then put her back down and she starts again, I have tried leaving her cry herself to sleep but cried for about an hour the other night before I picked her up, she will not settle on her dad she'll cry on him then the minuet she comes to me she stops.

what can I do to get her out of the habit? and to get her to settle, somewhere other then on me all the time? HELP

This happened to us and turned out to be reflux. Once that was fixed the crying stopped. It hurt babybiscuits only when lying down so picking up stopped it. Also wouldn't nap - didn't settle, but not screaming during the day. I think by bed time tiredness and frustration plus discomfort led to meltdown.

I asked my doctor and hv about that and they don't think it is.. it happens Duren the day too, she wont sleep in her crib atm shes got a bouncy chair she sleeps in.

If you've ruled out reflux maybe she just wants to stay close to you. Have you tried getting her off to sleep on you and then putting her down (taking very special care not to wake her in the process)?
I settled mine to sleep on me for the first year so I'm maybe not the kind of advice you were looking for. Just think of it as extra cuddles and bring your phone to keep you occupied.

They do grow out of it eventually.
I think the official advice is that controlled crying doesn't work until they are at least 6 months.
She is still very young and obviously wants/needs her mummy. Not so bad in the long run of things.

The sleeping upright in the bouncy chair but not in the crib is a classic reflux thing. Have a look at the reflux support boards online - hvs/drs often aren't really aware, esp if silent reflux.

A couple of things you could try (no magic answers but might help):

• does she have a comforter? Something only for sleep time and that you give her to hold while having a last bottle before bed. Babies don't like to be alone and a comforter can make them feel someone is still with them. My dd (now 20 mths) still sleeps clutching the same comforter she had at 4 mths.

• You could try putting her down to sleep on her side (not back) and putting a couple of rolled up towels in front and back to support her. My dd didn't have reflux but had wind/constipation and has always preferred sleeping on her side. We wedged her with towels like this until she could roll over on her own.

At 4 mths I could only put dd down asleep in the cot. I had to introduce the dummy before I could put her down awake (and that presented its own problems later on...).

Could be the 4 month sleep regression - was a hideous time for us!

Second the idea of a comforter; my DS1 (19 months) also had one introduced around then (along with a Ewan the Dreamsheep) and he still uses them to get to sleep.

DS1 was a lot older than 4 months before I could put him down awake. Had to get him to sleep on me or by me and wait until he was deeply asleep before I could pop him in his cot. However, at 19 months he is fabulous at self settling and if he's not tired will just potter in his cot until he is - so there is light at the end of the tunnel I promise!

Could it be the transfer from a warm body to a cold sheet? Wondering if you use a sleeping bag? I think they warm them up then don't notice the transfer so much, or sit on a blanket to warm it then lay it on their bed just before putting baby down perhaps? Good luck.

Has silent reflux been ruled out? Many GPs are not aware of this. My HV didn't have a clue with regards to silent reflux and told me to just accept I was unlucky and had a crying baby

I must add that two weeks on medication for silent reflux, and it was like I had a different baby