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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

to thumb suck or not to thumb suck?

27 replies

BocaDeTrucha · 05/01/2014 21:04

Ds (15 weeks) has finally got his coordination together and is enjoying the pleasures of sucking his thumb. He does have a dummy too but he's not that attached to it yet.

He is very sucky at the moment, not sure if it's early teething. My Mil was very quick to give her opinion on thumb sucking as something akin to devil worship but it seems like something he so naturally wants to do, especially when falling asleep. Is it really all that bad? I was a thumb sucker but never had a problem stopping. Am I making a problem for later on?

OP posts:

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TessTackle · 05/01/2014 21:07

I'm about to turn 23 and I still suck my thumb despite trying desperately to stop.

I'd advise anyone to nip it in the bud as early as possible, hth.

lovelyredwine · 05/01/2014 21:11

I would try to get him to take the dummy. My dd is still thumb sucking at 3 and does NOT want to stop. Dentist has said it is pushing her teeth forward. At least you can take the dummy away. I say this as someone who was very anti dummy and was quite happy with her sucking her thumb when she was tiny.

notasausage · 05/01/2014 21:16

I have 2 thumb suckers - DD1 stopped just before she was 5 a few months ago and I can already see a difference with her teeth. It is hard to stop though and I sucked my thumb until I was 12 when I got a brace for my teeth. Personally I would let him get on with it. Dummy's are also bad for teeth and though you can take them away I'm not sure it's necessarily an easy option

JollySantersSelectionBox · 05/01/2014 21:18

Tess - I can almost double your age and I am the same.

The worst case scenario for me was a series of painful tooth extractions and braces from the age of 11 to 15 to pull back my teeth. The shape of my mouth was definitely affected during key development and even now I have trouble closing my jaw properly which results in tooth grinding, and associated jaw pain and migraines. My front tooth has now split in half and had to be repaired.

A lot connected with the way my mother tried to get me to stop though. Smacking, wearing mittens to bed, bandaging my hand, and a whole pile of ridicule to make me feel small about my filthy habit.

I'm sure if it was to persist in later life you could action a reward system to stop. Or introduce a pacifier now as they are less harmful on the development of the mouth and teeth?

RandomMess · 05/01/2014 21:22

I had 2 thumb suckers and 2 dummy suckers. I'd go for dummies. Giving up the thumb sucking was very traumatic for one of them, with the dummy you can easily restrict it to bed times only.

Idislikemymil · 05/01/2014 21:23

I worried about my youngest sucking his thumb. He did it almost from birth and ALL of the time. His little thumbs got dry and sore from sucking them so much!! Also, he would not have a dummy and I tried lots of different kinds. He's still only 9 months, but seems to be growing out of it gradually. He doesn't do it at all during the day now, just at night time. He stopped when he discovered other things he could do (like hold toys/crawl/play with his willy(!!). At one point, I thought he'd never stop.

FamiliesShareGerms · 05/01/2014 21:26

Do anything you can to avoid a thumb sucker (DH still dies when tired or stressed, aged nearly 40,and would love to be able to quit)

Bankholidaybaby · 05/01/2014 21:28

My 19 week old is working on thumb sucking at the moment. I figured I'd just let him get on with it but it sounds like it might be better if he didn't manage it. If nipping it in the bud is a good idea, how should it be done? He has a dummy at sleep times. Don't mean to hijack - just thought some posters here might have experience of this.

ShoeWhore · 05/01/2014 21:29

Having had 1 dummy sucker (gave it up easily at 3) and 2 thumb suckers (still going strong at 6&7) I'd try a bit harder to persuade him to take the dummy tbh.

toastedteacake · 05/01/2014 21:30

My DS sucked his thumb regularly until he was 9 years old.

It was a great soother. (You can never lose your thumb in a cot or throw it out of a pram.)

As he got older he only sucked his thumb in bed at night.

We too were told by the dentist that the thumb sucking was affecting his teeth and he should stop. Now at 11 years old all his adult teeth have appeared, his jaw is still growing and adjusting, and his teeth have moved back as there is now more room for them.

Ilikesweetpeas · 05/01/2014 21:31

Another vote here for a dummy, getting dd to stop thumb sucking aged 5 was very traumatic for us both! It was pushing her teeth out of place.

ilovesmurfs · 05/01/2014 21:34

My five year old still sucks his thumb, the dentitst says its ok until hso big teeth start coming through bit we are encouraging him to give it up.

My dd is three and has a dummy bit just for sleep, I can choose when she has it which imo is a big advantage.

But my thumb sucker was my best sleeper as he could self sooth, I had many nights of havogn to plug trhe dummy back in... Pros amd con's to both.

INeedSomeHelp · 05/01/2014 21:37

I don't have any DCs so can't advise on how to stop it. But I was a thumb sucker as a child until I was about 11or 12. My DM would pull it out of my mouth when I was asleep and it would just automatically go straight back in without me even waking up.
I had to get a brace - one of the fixed ones - top and bottom. That was the only thing that stopped me - as I would probably have severed off my thumb if I tried!

BananaNotPeelingWell · 05/01/2014 21:38

My dd had to have a block brace. The dentist said thumb sucking was the cause.

Having said that her twin used to suck two fingers and hasn't needed any braces at all. So I'm never sure whether it was really just the thumb sucking or whether she'd have needed it anyway.

mawbroon · 05/01/2014 21:51

Are you breastfeeding? I nipped ds2's thumb sucking in the bud at a few weeks old by offering him the breast every time I saw him with his thumb in his mouth.

fuckwittery · 05/01/2014 22:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clio51 · 05/01/2014 22:11

My son 25 still sucks his thumb, esp watching tv or going to sleep.
He wouldn't take to a dummy of any size or shape
We tried everything gloves on, some stuff painting on his nail(clear),plaster on thumb. He always managed to take it off

Dentist wasn't happy but what do you do cut there thumb off!!
He ended up with brace for 2years soon as it came of he started back sucking he's thumb

But I would really really push the dummy

Original poster

BocaDeTrucha · 05/01/2014 22:55

fuckwittery, he did show signs of thumb sucking as early as 3 weeks when by fluke he got it into his mouth, around the time he started sucking his fists.

I am breast feeding but he tends to only do it when he's falling asleep so replacing his thumb with my boob is not that easy, especially as I'm trying to get him to sleep without feeding him to sleep. When getting him to nap, or if he wakes in the night, he takes his dummy, when half asleep he spits it out and his thumb goes straight in his mouth.

It's so hard when they're so small as when they finally find something that relaxes them, the last thing you want to do is take it away, but I don't want teeth problems when he's older, like my dsis who wore top and bottom braces from thumb sucking!!

OP posts:

ShadowFall · 06/01/2014 12:31

I'm not convinced by the "you can take a dummy" away argument.

DSis was a big dummy sucker, and when my parents tried taking the dummy away at about 5yrs, she started sucking her thumb instead. She didn't stop that till secondary school.

So I don't think dummies make much difference.

RandomMess · 07/01/2014 19:08

ShadowFall - that is why I didn't take my youngest's dummy away because she but her thumb in instead. She gave up the dummy herself at 7.5 - far younger than the other two gave up their thumbs, in fact one only gave up because it was that or a thumb guard from the orthodontist.

morethanpotatoprints · 07/01/2014 19:10

My dd was the only thumb sucker and now at 10 it finds its way to her mouth in her sleep.
It is really hard to stop. At least with a dummy you can throw it away, give to fairies, or on tree for another baby... add your own.

Mikkii · 07/01/2014 19:20

DS had a dummy, our dentist told us this would be ok as long as he stopped when he was 3. We took his dummy away on his 3rd birthday and he went cold turkey!

DD1 was a thumb sucker, until we went on holiday when she was 13 months and mummy forgot her teddy she did nothing for about 5 months, then plugged in a dummy she found. We took that away on her 3rd birthday and she reverted to her thumb. We are still trying yo get her out of the habit at almost 7. The dentist has told us it is affecting her jaw. He is trying to persuade her only to suck it in bed. We take her comforter away from her in the daytime if her thumb goes in.

DS makes it his last job at night (after his final bathroom visit) to pop into her room and pull her thumb out of her mouth (bless).

DD2 would gag on a dummy. She occasionally sucks a thumb or a finger when tired. As it is so rare, we let her get on with it.

Toecheese · 07/01/2014 19:37

Thumbs are great! Two of my four thumb sucked and they were the best to self sooth and were able to fall sleep quickly.

My dentist said its best to stop before the adult teeth come through - so it's fine with milk teeth

Playitagainsam · 07/01/2014 22:24

This really worries me about my dd too. She's 20 mo and sucks her thumb A LOT. She's done it since around 6 months and is showing no signs of stopping. Always been completely disinterested in dummies. I'm worried about what it will do to her teeth and jaw but it is impossible to stop her doing it.
On the flipside she is a great sleeper and she gets a lot of comfort from it.

Theonlyoneiknow · 07/01/2014 23:56

My DD 18mo loves her thumb. She only really sucks it though if she has her comforter which she only gets at nap and bed time. I know she sucks her thumb and snuggles her comforter to get to sleep but when I check in the monitor later it if often out of her mouth. If she stirs in the night though she will feel around for her comforter and the thumb goes straight back in, and it's always in her mouth in the morning.

I think there would be hell if I took her comforter away to try and get her to stop sucking her thumb. At the moment am just going to leave be and see how she gets on.

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